Dead End | Jun-ho

20 | From Hope to Despair

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For once, waking up felt comforting. Aera appeared less doubtful, feeling well-rested after such a long time of deprivation and exhaustion. It was different, compared to waking up whilst she was still caught up in the games: heart rapidly beating, sweat trickling down her forehead with no way to control her breathing.

It was nothing to do with how much sleep she'd had, or however more comfortable she felt in the sheets of his bed. She just felt more relaxed for once, coming to the realisation that she was safe, after all.

Her eyes softly opened, slowly blinking back the thoughts of last night. The curtains were closed, unable to see out to the cliffs as she could the previous morning. And he wasn't there to greet her.

Ignorance and nonchalance; the commence of her night. Jun-ho hadn't given much in response to her questions. Aera had tried her best to push his disregard for her curiosity away, knowing his minimal answers were to stop him from getting into trouble. She understood it was to protect them both, realising she wouldn't be able to go home if anybody found out what he'd done.

The evening soon evolved; sympathy and vulnerability etched in his voice and actions. She struggled to stay mad after, his gentle words soothing her anger. Aera was surprised, not realising he was capable of acting in such a manner. For the most part, she'd seen anger and passionate hatred, occasionally showing a softer side. Sometimes she thought when he was being nice it was some sort of bribe, to get her to comply with him. But last night felt genuine, like he truly meant it.

She smiled to herself, reminiscing about the small fragments of hope from yesterdays evening. Aera took a deep breath in, starting her day off.

As strange as it was, she felt like a caterpillar, going through a complete transformation; this time only in one short night. Aera felt freed, the wings of a butterfly emerging intangibly from her back. It was almost as if she were a teenager all over again, a smile printed onto her face until she'd fallen asleep. Not taking her long to fall asleep, the euphoric moments before she did had left her with only thoughts about him.

The usual urge to fall back asleep; deeply embed herself back into darkness and serenity, had long left her, having a good feeling about the day.

Appearing as though she was wasting time, she took the duvet off her body, patting quietly to the bathroom. As routinely as yesterday, the red jumpsuit she had dressed in previously was laid neatly on the counter once again. Aera wanted to continue with her light-hearted attitude, keeping the joyful thoughts of hope in the front of her mind. But the bright colour brought her back to reality, realising yet again she would have to undergo another work day.

Hope soon returned, remembering the kitchen was far better than working in the game arena. She couldn't bare to do that again. They made her so panicky; the feeling of revulsion and heartbreak mixed in to one. Aera didn't blame herself, it would be wrong if she did. People had died right in front of her eyes, now experiencing what Mi-sun had, just in a different manner.

Out of the three games she'd experienced, coming close to completing them herself had never been in her favour. The first,
Mi-sun had thankfully saved her. The second, she'd nearly gotten herself killed out of her own stupidity and panic, luckily getting saved yet again. And finally the third, where she hadn't needed to play it, yet had fainted at the sight. To sum it up, she was eternally grateful to be working in the kitchens.