Deciphered --- A Sirius Black FanFic

Dumb Bitch

"Hey... Roman, right?" I hear a male voice behind me. I turn around to see who it is and my eyes were met with a familiar Slytherin.

"Yes. Regulus?"

"Mhm. Can you tell me what that whole thing was about earlier, in the Great Hall?" He asks. I motion for him to keep walking with me as I don't want to be late for my next class.

"So basically, Remus and Sirius got into an argument about.. uh.. well Remus didn't tell them I existed so. But then Remus said James said he'd fuck you and so that started-" I was cut off in my walking and words as he stops in front of me.

"You said what? James said what?" He questions almost in disgust. I put my hand on his chest so he'd back up and I continue walking, him following behind me.

"It was a game of smash, marry, kill. It was under fair conditions that he'd say that. Besides, he didn't mean it. Not that anyone would." I mutter as I eye his figure up and down.

He pushes me against the wall, causing me to drop my bag. He takes his hand and pushes my hair out of my face. At that moment, I grab his hand and push it away.

"Whatever do you mean by that, hm?" He scoffs.

"I mean you're a skank. I've heard about you, you're a blood supremacist, you're a liar-" He cuts me off again.

"And you're a dumb bitch. Don't think I haven't heard about you too. Do you think Gryffindors keep their mouths quiet to others? Their words fly across the room like a newly freed bird. You practically terrified some this morning. Rumor says you took one look in the mirror and couldn't stand what looked back at you. Pathetic." He pushes himself off of me. I'm practically frozen in place.

"Don't assume things. Rumors are just words." I try to defend myself but to no avail, as he smirks and laughs at me.

"Then tell me, what really happened? Are you sure it's just words? Or are you truly just full to the brim with hate for yourself?" He waits a few seconds for me to answer, which I never do. He then scoffs and lets out a "That's what I thought." as he begins to walk away.

"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone. And nobody was talking about you, I just know things." He laughs as he walks away and I immediately start chasing after my class in hopes to forget about these events by the time I arrived.

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Once I get into the class, I notice it's class with Slytherin. Perfect. I sit down next to Sirius as Remus sat next to James.

"What's with the long face? A trip on the stairs? Yeah, I've done that before." I guess Sirius was trying to make me laugh or something but I just give him a quick smile and then turn back to the table.

"Here." Remus hands me a rubber band and I take it. He taught me to use them when I felt stressed or like I couldn't talk. Immediately, I begin making it slap against my wrist.

My leg is pumping up and down uncontrollably even with my efforts to make it stop. I look up and around for a moment just to be met with the face of the same Slytherin. Only this time, he looks upset. He gives the same fake smile I tend to use then looks down at his parchment.

I'm snapped out of my trance as the teacher walks in and slams a book onto her desk.

"Now would anyone like to tell me the difference between someone with a wolf animagus and a werewolf? Please, anybody." The professor asks as she looks around. Of course, our entire table looks at one another.

"You four look like you have something to say. How about you, what's your name?" She asks as she looks straight at me. I look straight at Remus, not knowing what to do in this situation.

"Well? Mr. Lupin won't help you." She walks over to our table. She's the same lady that had helped with the sorting.

"Uhm, well. My name is Roman. Uh, Lupin. Roman Lupin. And the uh, the answer is uhm. An animagus is someone who can free form transform into the same thing as their patronus. And a werewolf is someone who has no control over their changing and forgets everything once they change, including who they are." I say but never make eye contact with her though she was practically daring me to.

"Hmm, alright. Good job. Now there are many steps to becoming a werewolf but many more to becoming an animagus.." I try to listen but her voice trails off as I'm caught back in my thoughts.

My leg starts shaking again as I'm filled with stress, I hadn't thought it would be like this. Well, that was until a weight fell onto my thigh of the shaking leg. I look up and see Sirius paying no mind to anything but his notes. He's wearing a small smile on his face and rubs his thumb over my leg a few times before going back to writing.

I take out some parchment and begin copying what he'd already written as I wasn't focused. I notice myself feeling less stressed as he continues with his hand.

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"Alright, you lot, don't forget the extra work you've been assigned tonight." The professor says as she dismisses us.

The whole class, Sirius kept his hand on my thigh to keep me calm. Once the class was dismissed, he took back his hand and began packing up his stuff. I did the same, a bit disappointed at the new lack of contact. It was comforting.

"Hey, Roman. Can I talk to you?" I hear a voice behind me ask. I turn around only to be faced with Regulus. I look back to get help from Sirius but he'd already gone off with James and Remus.

"Sure," I say before he grabs my hand and leads me into the hallway. I follow him, not wanting a yelling match like earlier. Eventually, we come to a stop and he puts me against the wall again luckily, not in the same aggressive way as before.

"I'm really sorry about earlier, that wasn't cool. I got in my head and just snapped I guess. I know that's just an excuse but I really am sorry." He says as he scratches his neck, he seems uncomfortable. Has he never apologized before or something? I was about to say something before I was cut off.

"Roman, what are you doing? Come on. I told you not to hang around him." Sirius says once he comes around the corner with Remus.

Remus grabs my arm and tries to pull me away from where I was. I didn't know what to do so I just accepted what was happening. Apparently, it's national 'Drag Roman Around the Halls Day'.

"Are you kidding me? I try to be nice ONE TIME. God, you really are full of yourself, aren't you?" Regulus exclaims his feelings on the matter in a rather loud way.

"Yeah and what are you trying to be nice about? Hm?" Sirius questions as he stands off against his brother.

"For your information, I was apologizing. I was a dick to Roman earlier and wanted to say sorry." He explains. He finishes his sentence with a scoff and then walks away, face full of disbelief.

"Are you alright?" Remus asks as he turns his attention back to me.

"Yeah, fine. Can you stop treating me like a kid? I'm a year younger than you, not 5." I pull my arm away from him and begin walking back to the common room. Well, it was supposed to be the common room.

"Well, shit. Where even am I?" I question out loud as I accept I've lost my way.

I keep walking until I find a big, metal staircase. I walk up for what seems like forever before reaching the top. There was a huge met globe in the middle, but instead of land, there were stars. Cool.

I guess I just have to hang out up here til someone else comes up. I shrug and sit down facing the outside of the campus. The sky was beautiful, full of clouds with just a light blue background. This was better than any sunset.