Glimpse of Us | Jenlisa [COMPLETED]

Chapter 11

The diner is half-full, the buzz from conversations around them a perfect backdrop for a casual, easy lunch. It's past 3 already, though, so Jennie isn't sure if it counts as lunch. Not dinner, yet, though. She's having dinner with Kai and Ella back home.

Is there even a word to describe a meal at this time? Like brunch? Jennie is nervous.

Her ex-wife sits across from her, idly thumbing her phone while they wait for the food to arrive.

She doesn't blame Lisa, she can read her face like it was still the first day (Jennie wonders if that will ever stop) and knows by her frown, she's nervous too. Lisa uses books and cell phones like crutches when she's nervous, which almost never happened.

Jennie looks out to the street.

It's not uncomfortable per se, just strange, after so long. She knows it won't last. Once their food gets here and now that they're both firmly trying, things will go back to normal. Or, their new normal, the one they're trying to build. They can be civil, and talk, just talk. (At least, Jennie hopes. She doesn't think the other night was a fluke.)

Because the other night Jennie had slipped back into banter with Lisa so easily. She'd spoken to her as easy as breathing, like the months, years hadn't passed. Flirting, is what she did at one point, which is all sorts of ridiculous, because she has a boyfriend and Lisa is her ex-wife.

(It had nothing to do with the way Irene was looking at Lisa back at the theater, the obvious look in her eyes as she flirted with her ex-wife in front of her eyes. How it prickled, in her chest and across her skin. Not that it matters. Lisa can do what she wants. Jennie knows it's irrational, that she doesn't have a leg to stand on here, that she doesn't get to be uncomfortable. Still.)

But that hour, at the restaurant?

It was the first time this week Jennie hadn't been consumed with worry about her appointment. Lisa's presence always had a way of calming her down, and it's the excuse she gives herself, for how she acted.

It was also the first time she'd seen such a big smile on Ella's face while they were both in the same room, since her birthday party.

And now? Sitting in front of her in the middle of a diner, like they used to do so many years ago, it's so difficult to keep her old feelings in check. She's moved on. (She has, she's with Kai, she has.) But even though she might not be in love anymore doesn't mean she doesn't love Lisa.

Even before, when there was still anger and resentment, she could acknowledge that. They have a child together. There's no erasing that. A part of her will always love Lisa, those feelings will always be there, inside her, like the perennial oak tress that line her childhood street. Lisa lines her heart, her name is scribbled everywhere in its surface.

Jennie couldn't forget her if she tried. And she's done trying.

They can make this work. Their marriage is long gone but they can be better mothers, the mothers Ella deserves. She told her daughter things would be different and she'll be damned if she doesn't try her hardest to make that happen.

Lisa smiles at her, faint, but it's still there.

It seems Jennie's not the only one willing to try.

***

(December 29th, 2023)

"Why doesn't mommy cook no more?" Ella asks, looking up at Jennie. "I want veggie bits."