SECOND CHANCES(A Lesbian Story)

Chapter 16

Mika drove fast... dangerously fast. She continued like that until she was half way to Pulilan and she realized what she was doing. Then she stopped the car altogether and stared at the tail lights of the zipping vehicles past her. Her hands started shaking and she held them together tightly against her mouth, letting her teeth sink into a finger, hoping it might take her mind off the pain in her heart if she created pain somewhere else.

There was nothing left to hope for. Why had she hoped at all? Why hadn't she seen weeks ago that Vic Galang's interest in her went only as far as her body? Why had she paused just for a second, during lunch, to give a little more thought to what she had said? Just fleetingly, there had been a moment when she had wondered whether there might be some truth in Vic's saying she loves her. She had given it momentary consideration only because she had never before known her boss to say something she did not mean. Vic was the type of person who would say nothing rather than do that.

Was there no end to her stupidity?

It has to end now! Right now!

She placed the gear lever to drive and drove on at a reasonable pace. She wasn't going to risk death because she had lost someone she had never had in the first place. Nor would she let this ruin her life. She had been through that once in the past. This time it would be different. She had built her life again after losing Kiefer, she would do it again now.

She would write her letter of resignation and submit it at once. She needed to quit her job. She won't be able to bear seeing Vic with her future wife. Next week, her boss will find out she was not going back. Nothing and no one could make her step foot inside that office building again.

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Her sister-in-law, Julie was asleep by the time she got to the house and so was the newborn baby. Her parents and Kuya Perry were watching a late-night film in HBO, but they switched the television off when Mika arrived.

"You looked tired, Mika"

"You look strained. Are you sick?"

"Why did you not wait for tomorrow to drive her? It is very late. We all thought you decided to stay the night in Alabang."

Mika could not talk about what happened. She does not want to talk about it. She could not tell them anything. She waved away their questions and told them laughingly it had been quite a day... with all those children and the noise they made.

"Come on Kuya Perry. Don't keep me waiting any longer. Show me your new son."

She and her brother sneaked quietly into his bedroom where the baby was sleeping.

"Only for the first couple of weeks, you understand." Her brother whispered laughingly. "After that, he will be in the nursery where he belongs."

"Oist, Kuya, tama na muna ang anak. Wag na munang maghabol ng babae. Mahal magpaaral baka akala mo." She jested.

"I agree one hundred and one percent." Julie opened her eyes sleepily.

"Oh, Julie. I am so sorry if we woke you up." Mika apologized for the disturbance. "I just had to see him straight away. He is very beautiful."

"Like Perry."

Mika giggled. "No, not like my brother. Mas gwapo di hamak kaya ang bago kong pamangkin." She gave her sister-in-law a wink. "Have you decided on a name?"

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Because her parents were occupying the guest room, Mika had to sleep in the couch in the living room that night. Not that it mattered. She did not sleep at all until the early hours and it was brief. She was sure however that the comfort of a bed would not have made any difference.