Lavi's RivaEreRi Fall Fest collection

I stay up all night (tell myself I'm all right)

Warning: Major character death.

Extra tags: canonverse, canon divergence, drunken confessions, dancing, pub/bar/tavern, depression, alcoholism, regrets, angst, hurt no comfort, heartbreak, takes place before S4

Prompt: alcohol

Day: 30 [ Oct 30, 2k22 ]

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Date: October 30, 8××

Levi settled on a barstool of the tavern, black hood ruffling on top of his head, as he ordered a bottle of whiskey. Eren sank down beside him on his own stool, and when someone approached, Levi shot a glare his way. "Fuck off, buddy. We don't want any company."

The man blinked and walked off. Eren just chuckled and ordered a glass of gin. "Why drag me here if you don't like people?" Levi suppressed the smile that threatened to break out when he heard the boy laugh. No one was aware, not even the soldiers of the Survey Corps or the boy himself, but Levi was absolutely smitten with the Titan Shifter. He was especially fond of Eren's smile, eyes, and voice. And his big, broken heart.

"They have nice whiskey," Levi mumbled into his flask.

"Aaah, okay. But can't you just buy a bottle and take it in your quarters? Don't think anyone could stop you if ya wanted to." Eren swished the brownish liquid in his short glass, green eyes roving the room before landing on his Captain, full attention captured. Just how Levi preferred, to be honest.

He squeezed his eyes shut and kept his head low to avoid Eren and the small crowd of civilians and tavern workers from seeing his mild vulnerability. Fuck, he loved Eren. The stupid brat was just too goddamn dense to realize it.

"You don't like whiskey. It's cheaper here, anyways, and you can't take it to go, owner's rules." Levi took a swig of his drink again as the bartender watched him warily.

"Hmm. Alright. Oh, hey! A guitar! Does anyone here know how to play?" The man who had tried to approach before raised his hand. "Cool!" Eren laughed, the light in his eyes, previously dim, brightened as he asked, "can you play a tune? Something to dance to, perhaps?"

Levi sighed into the flask, but he let Eren be. It's the boy's first time in a tavern, let him have his fun. As the man picked up the guitar and tuned it, Eren finished his gin and stood up. Levi barked in surprise when his hand was gripped, and he was yanked to the center of the half empty room. "The hell, you brat! I don't fucking dance."

He growled until a familiar note hit the air. His whole mind seized with nostalgia as it escalated slowly, a soft male voice reaching his tired ears.

Eren began singing as long-buried memories returned, ones he thought no longer haunted him. Of Isabel, his adopted street slash soul sister. Others of Furlan, his friend; his adopted street slash soul brother. His dead mother and abusive uncle. The place he promised himself he'd never return to. He swallowed down the pain of them as he tightly gripped Eren's hand. The boy led him in a slow dance, speeding it up until he was skipping and spinning and laughing, singing louder. Levi stood there and watched off to the side, enthralled with the Shifter's beauty.

Other's joined, arm-in-arm, more spinning and skipping and laughter, German lyrics mixing with English, voices rising and falling, the song on a loop as the scene escalated. Levi hated touching people he knew nothing about, so he remained where he was, silently enjoying the view of his love interest having the most fun he's had since he was a child.

And thinking about it, Levi realized that Eren hasn't had any fun in over a decade, maybe more. With two dead parents and his home gone, a few dead friends and betrayal resting on his shoulders like hundred pound weights, and the responsibility of being Humanity's Last Hope sitting on his shoulders like thousand pound weights, he has never been able to enjoy being alive. There's been too much blood and carnage and death in his short life for him to experience living.

At the end of the night, a tipsy Eren hanging onto his shoulders, a couple bottles of whiskey tied to Levi's hips in a pouch, they made their way back to headquarters. Eren was still laughing, head swimming from the alcohol he had consumed in the small amount of time they wound up staying at the tavern. Levi was responsible for dragging the little shit to bed, his ruptured heart bursting with adoration for the foolish idiot he called his monster.

"Eren, fucking open your eyes and help me walk you to your shitty bed. I'm not going to trip over my goddamn feet because you decided to drink a little too much tonight." Levi caught them before they toppled over, pushing Eren against a wall as a stranger walked by and gave them — well, more like the Captain - they kept their eyes away from the brunet for some weird reason — a weird look before disappearing around a corner.

"S-sorry, Heichou." Eren giggled as he looped his arm through Levi's. "Come on. I wanna sleep in your bed," Eren slurred, his breath loaded with disgusting alcohol.

Maybe Levi was a little too lenient on the boy's fun tonight. Guess it was his fault. "No. You have your own damn bed. Let's go." Levi once again began dragging them towards headquarters and towards the Shifter's room.

It had been closed off for the while, both Captain's and Eren's orders.

"'M s'eepy. Heichou, before we go to bed, I hafta tell ya somet'in'." Eren wobbled and hit the wall, pulling Levi with him.

Levi grunted and shifted their weight as he started to walk again. "Yeah? What is it, brat?"

"I—" the boy stopped as a series of hiccups took over him. When they cleared, he finished the sentence he started. "I l-love you, Corporal. I have since a loooong time ago. In that crystal cave where you saved me. Or maybe before that. I don' remember, exactly. But it was sometime arounds there."

He was beginning to not make sense. Definitely drunk off his ass, then. Not just tipsy. Damn lightweight.

But Levi couldn't control his reaction to those words. Love. Eren loved him. Him. Humanity's Strongest fucking Soldier. But why? He's left the boy alone for so many years, let him grow, let him meet whoever he wanted to. Gave him time to search for his own love without wasting it on an old man like him.

"You do, don't you? Well, how about this: I'll give you some pain meds and water in the morning and let your hangover disappear before we talk, and if you still feel the same, maybe I'll—" but Eren didn't let Levi finish his words.

Levi felt a warm softness on his lips. When Eren pulled back, Levi realized he'd just been kissed. His first kiss, too. He was stunned. Inside, in the smitten part of his brain, he was elated. Full of satisfaction. Eren liked him enough to kiss him, at the very least. And Levi was happy with that. Eren noticed him, and that alone made Levi happy. He smiled into Eren's brilliant green eyes, smirking.

"Go to bed, idiot. Sleep, and we'll talk tomorrow."

Before Levi could fully turn to the door, Eren said, "but Captain, I won't be here tomorrow."

Levi turned around, brows knit together. Did he forget something? An appointment? "Oh, alright. Then later."

"Captain, please, if you feel the same, say it back! I beg you! Please..."

Eren got on his knees at his Captain's feet, hands gripping at the lapels of his jacket underneath his rumpled cloak.

"I... I love you, Eren Jaeger," Levi whispered to himself, back hitting the mattress as he recalled the last night he ever spent with the boy he loved. A tear slipped down his cheek as he said again, just a little louder, "I love you, Eren Jaeger."