GENESIS OF A SUGAR DADDY

V/ THE BEST MALE FRIEND

Back to my twenties, I'm twenty five years old, in two years I will graduate from my master, I'm confident. I will later get a job, for sure, I was one of the best students in my promotion which means I will be someone in this society, I will change things. But there is this girl, Jessica. Jessica was something else but human.
From me and not only, Jessica was the hottest girl on the campus, everybody even the professors  wanted her. But I had a strategic advantage over them; what I thought. I lived in the same town with her and we even shared the same street. Her house was two blocks before ours. Wasn't it a sign from God? If not what coincidence would have made her live this close?
- But please admit it, she loves me, look at this picture, have you seen how she held me?
- Guy don't dream, she was not in love with you, she's only friendly with you.
That's usually the catchphrase most of my friends were telling me. Were they jealous of me? Indeed, I was the best friend of Jessica, that's what people were telling and I genuinely didn't care about it.
I was convinced it would end up into a real love story, you know, these ones that have always been told to us. Two young people in the university who start to be friends, find out they have some common activities and view points on certain subjects and then they deeply fall in love and then get married. Yeah, that would be my story, I spent many nights thinking of our future, our children, what beautiful ones? Like their mother. How many? Maybe four or five would be sufficient. What about our house? I would take a credit from the bank to get us a nice one and Jessica would take also a credit to get us a nice car. During holidays if our boss gave us some we would travel to the village to see our parents and bring them some stuff from the city. I will invite her twice  in a month, she will be happy for sure, Ahh! What a wonderful life!
Yeah that's me, I mean the old me, and I can now see myself in this young man thirty years later, trying to get  the heart of this girl who doesn't even give an inch on him.
Did Jessica also consider me like this? Were all the efforts I made free? She didn't even have this feeling that she hurt me? What did I do wrong?
Now I know what I did wrong, I was broke and my mind was poor.
I can still remember when I revealed my feelings to her.
- I'm sorry if by the way I behave you have thought I'm interested in you but you are not my type, I consider you as a friend and I have a boyfriend.
She had a boyfriend, what boyfriend? Where does he live? I mean does he even exist? We have been closed to each other for almost one year and she had  never told me of this guy.
- I understand what you are saying but could we at least stay friends?
- No, I don't think it is a good idea. Sorry but I have to go.
'' SORRY I HAVE TO GO''? After all this time I spent running after her, that was all, only because I told her I was in love with her. she rejected me this way without any pity. I didn't know I was this much undesirable. I cried all the tears of my body, I could feel my blood boiling inside my body.
SORRY I HAVE TO GO... I lost a part of my soul at this moment, how could she treat me this way? Did all my dreams stay dreams?