In the Silence (Steve Rogers x Reader)

A New Day

The next morning, you lay awake on your closet floor. You couldn't sleep in the bed, it was too soft and the room was too open. Back in hydra, you used to miss your bed, you hated sleeping on the cell floor, and yet now that you have the chance, you can't do it. You got a few hours of sleep in, but not much, and the few hours you did get in were riddled with nightmares.

You sit up, opening the closet door, allowing it to flood with light. You throw on a baggy shirt and some joggers before heading downstairs. When you get there, you see everyone sitting around the table.

Everyone greets you and you give a slight wave, sitting down at the table. Tony scoops an omelet onto your plate and you stare at it. He sits down beside you and waits for you to take a bite.

"You have to eat," He says.

He continues to stare at you so you take a small bite, trying not to gag. Suddenly Bucky stands up, the noise of his chair startles you and you flinch.

He comes back with a plate containing apple slices and a piece of bread. He sets it down in front of you, taking your omelet away before sitting back in his seat. He gives you a nod and you take a bite of the apple.

'Thank you' you sign

"Sure thing" He says

"Wait, you know sign language?" Steve asks

you nod

"Y/N knows many languages and forms of communication," Tony says "Barnes, why did you take her omelet?"

"She needs time to adjust, a little flavor at a time, for her stomach's sake." Bucky says

"Why?" Tony asks

"The food in Hydra was very flavorless, after time you adjust to it, then it's a major shock when you try regular food. Soon she'll be glad to have flavor back in her life."

When everyone's done eating, you help Steve and Bucky do the dishes.

"So" Steve says "how are you adjusting to being back to normal life?"

'I can't even make myself talk, nothing about this is normal' you sign

"Do you want to talk?" Bucky asks

'Yes...no...I don't know...maybe'

"So why don't you?" Steve asks

'I don't know'

"Is it because you're afraid?" Steve questions, drying the last dish.

'I guess'

"But you don't have to be scared, you're safe now"

'God...can you just stop it. I feel helpless enough as is, I feel trapped inside a body with no way out, and most of the time I want to crawl out of my skin after everything that happened. I spent six years in that hell hole, which is already bad enough, but then you add the fact that I'm a woman to it and it gets even worse. For six fucking years I felt absolutely powerless, and now that I'm out of there I don't need you treating me like some damsel in distress, cause I'm not. So stop with the stupid reassurance, I'm sick of hearing that I'm safe now and that everything is going to be ok because I was told that same fucking thing before I went on that fucking mission.'

you storm out of the room leaving both men shocked.

You sit in your room reading a book when you hear a knock on the door. You stand up, opening the door to see Steve and Bucky.

"We're sorry" They both say, giving you puppy dog eyes

You shake your head, a slight smile tugging at your lips

"Did you almost smile?" Bucky asks sounding shocked

You look down, fighting the smile back. Bucky starts poking your arm

"You almost smiled, you like us" he teases

You finally let out a full smile.

"You have a beautiful smile doll" Steve says

You look up at him, blushing.

"So, do you forgive us?" Bucky asks

You nod.

"Good, now come on." Steve says "The avengers are having a movie day"

You follow the guys out and down stairs.