MARRED

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN - HIS GHEERAH

Ahmad

I stood there, with my arms crossed, glaring down at Amanah for a long time. I was frustrated with this woman. In what language she wanted me to tell her to stay clear off Kamal before she understood bewiled me. I walked past her and bent down to retrieve all the documents.

She bent also, in hope to retrieve the documents, but I snapped at her as she began to kneel before me.

"Don't! Just shut the door and take a seat, Amanah."

She flinched at my tone and the use of her full name. Good. I needed her to understand that I was angry with her.

Mutely, she did as she was instructed, and when I was done picking up the documents, I joined her at my desk, taking my seat just adjacent to hers. I dropped the file on the table.

Amanah was not a timid woman. I had fast learnt that with me, she just wanted to obey first and then complain afterwards. It was an attribute of hers I admired so much. But this was no time to admire her. I was not pleased with her.

I leaned into the desk, pulled out a pen from it's hold, and started to tap the desk with it, my eyes meeting her unwavering ones.

I had so many mixed emotions. Hurt, disappointment, anger, and yet, the need to be soft and caring towards her. I also had the urge to flare up in anger and yell at her and Allah knew I would be in my right to do so. Instead, when I spoke, my tone was calm and controlled. It was almost as though I did not know who I was anymore. With her, I always remembered she needed to be treated gently, even when she drove me to impatience.

"So, there was this man," I began ever so slowly. "He was supposed to have an all-day-in-meeting with the future partners if his company today, such a huge step for his company, you know." My voice was calm, controlled, almost...menacing. I could see she wasn't sure how to react. Fearful or bold. She was bold though, meeting my gaze as a match.

"But barely an hour into the meeting, he could not concentrate." I continued. "He kept thinking about his new bride. How beautiful and intelligent she was. How lucky he was to have been the one she chose. He wondered what she was doing at the moment. Was she thinking about him? What would she have for lunch today? He just couldn't wait to see her face and tell her how much he had missed her though they had been separated for just two hours. So, he made the meeting break for recess way earlier than he should have.

I stopped tapping the pen while my expression hardened once again. "But when he looked down the window, his wife... His woman was practically being drooled over by another man, the same man, the very same man he had warned her to stay clear off! And what was even worse was that she wasn't even attempting to put him off, tell him she was a married woman!"

I finished off and dropped the pen with an impatient thud and looked away.

She looked hurt, as though she was being unjustly accused. She opened her mouth to say something, and then shut it and opened it again.

If I had thought Amanah Sa'eed was just going to accept she was wrong and apologize, I had another think coming.

She sat straight in my chair and picked the same pen I had dropped. Ever so slowly, she began as well, clearly replicating my earlier stance and mood.

"I know of a man." She began also. "He was good, good at making promises. He would let his new bride get used to the idea of their marriage at her own pace, let tell her teammates at her own time about their marriage. He trusted her enough to know her Islamic morals would allow her the best sense of judgement. Who her mahaarim were and weren't. And how best to stay clear off the latter."