𝓘𝓷 𝓶𝔂 𝓯𝓮𝓮𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼 //James Hetfield

Chapter 8 - Unexpected turn

I didn't sleep much. Just enough to get me through the day. My mind was occupied with James's picture. During the night I grabbed my phone a few times just to look at it. I am the only one in the world who has this picture. It feels like a part of him; a very public character; is only for me and me only. I turned around in my bed thinking about what could have been his reaction to my picture. I thought that what I sent was too much for a slight moment but given the lingering lust we have for each other, I doubt that. He makes me so alive and I won't regret at least trying. I think so much and feel so much and nothing has even happened between us. I can't help but imagine being with him, at his side, not only for lust but also for him.

I'm trying my best to look alive at work. Pamela is in a bad mood. She actually entered the pharmacy and threw some papers on the floor screaming "motherfucker". She never tells me anything about her personal life and considering her pissy mood I won't dare ask.

The day is slow, it's like it will never end! The store is closed because we had inventory to do, then we've got deliveries and now we're cleaning and stocking back the shelves. I feel like I am dragged into the hell of one of Pamela's manic episodes. But frankly, it occupies my mind.

"- Hey Ann, can you put the TV on?! Like a music channel or something?!" Pamela asks me.

"- Yeah for sure!" i answer.

There's a TV on one of the shelves behind the counter, it's mostly used for commercials and stuff. Those give you headaches all the time and that's why I hate this TV. Except on inventory day, we put it on for music. It goes from shitty music videos to the old music I am so fond of up to interviews and lives. Right now there's this loud guy who's talking about some new exclusive interview with Metallica coming up next. Wait? Metallica?! I turn the sound up to be able to hear clearly. This must be the interview James was in San Francisco for.

"- Hey guys how are y'all doing?" the journalist asks.

Oh god, it is. I can see James clearly, he is the same. He doesn't put up a character or anything. I mean to me he is already very aloof and strong minded so I guess you don't need to change a thing when you're the frontman of a metal band. The fact is, his sweet smile and good heart doesn't disappear either. He mixes them both so well and stays himself. His voice is calm and his words are well chosen, it reminds me of how much I love talking to him. It makes me so happy. I hope I will see him lost in his music one day. Seeing him play must say so many more things.

I recognise Kirk next to him, he looks and sounds the same as when I met him. And the two other guys must be Lars and Robert. Who is who tho? Who is the one that would look the most like an hyperactive drummer boy? I could check but I'll let it go so I can discover it when time comes. If it ever comes. James looks so busy. They are passionately talking about their new upcoming album and their tour next year. I don't know if I will see him as much as I do today and this thought makes me sad. All the people I have an attachment to all go away at some point. I shouldn't think about it. I don't even know what I exactly feel about James. I shake my head around trying to get back to my work and get those thoughts out of my head.

"- So last but not least. James this question might be too personal but we know things changed around in your personal life. We'd love to know how things are going?" the reporter asked James.

I turn my head around. What a shitty question. "Personal life". It means what it says for Christ's sake! Still, I'd love to hear the answer. Just morbid curiosity. From what Stacy told me, I finally remember he got a divorce not long ago. I don't why but this information came back to mind now. Then he moved out here but we never talked about it and as much as I'd love to know about it in a more intimate setting and not through a very public interview I can't stop but listening to the answer. He is very secretive about it so I can't stop thinking he doesn't know what he feels about all that. He has this whole life build for himself, what could he possibly find interesting about a young chick like me? I know he's not doing all that just for my ass, but then, why?