Things keep going downhill. I'm used to it at this point. I'm going to try to get into shape now because I'm in the pre diabetes stage. Everything is so hard to talk about when you have only a therapist to talk to. My friends don't talk to me anymore. Between their jobs and their other friends there's really no room for me. I've applied for a job too but I haven't heard anything from them. It's almost my birthday so I'll be sixteen years old and have more of a reason to start taking care of myself. I wish I was back on the field with all of the friends that I used to have. I would get hurt and tired easily but it was fun. I loved hearing everyone play the music. I liked it even better when I played with them and could hear it all blend together. If the world was like music I think everything would be so perfect. We all just blend together. I've been practicing on my musical skills. I like day dreaming of a place where I'm fit and popular. A world where I'm important and needed. But it's all in my head.
