Your War, My War

| Chapter II |

Anything anyone knew of me was from my younger years. My peak years, my years when I was more open and social. Older girls normally pass down personality traits of older girls to their younger ones, so they feel more comfortable. 

I stood tall beside my bed, looking around seeing where we were as a group. A few younglings were still straightening folds and creases. Older girls were adjusting their dress collars or fluffing out pillows. Soon, the housemother and sisters entered into the room. The housemother inspected each bed carefully, walking slowly through each aisle. Her heels clacked against the floor, echoing with each step. I kept my eyes forward, not concerned on where she was going. Younger children intently followed her through the room. 

The sisters were very strict for the most part. Some were kinder and easier on us than others; you just had to know which sister to go to. Sometimes, depending on situations, you would want to go to the stricter ones. The sisters did their best in making the environment safe and welcoming for the younger ones, but having a mother was different than an overlooker. 

The strictest sister of them all, and considered the housemother, was Sister Mary Vincent. 

Sister Mary Vincent was the eldest of the sisters and was most imitating. She wore her rosaries on her hip, causing them to make a soft clinking sound when she moved. She was a grumpy old woman, but very wise. I knew deep down she loved us all but didn't know how to show it. No one argued with her, as she was older. Surrender and give her the mental win. You can't win a fight with a wise old woman, either. If you did happen to, expect a long teaching about it. After the bed inspections were finished, a few girls would be selected to help make breakfast, excusing them from knitting. All girls would knit, no matter the age. Occasionally, we'd sew. It wouldn't take too long before breakfast was prepared. All the girls line up and headed to the dining hall. 

Around 8:00 A.M. Porridge, as always. Oh, how the bitter taste sits in my mouth.

While eating breakfast, we are not to talk, and if we did, it was in a low whisper. You weren't allowed to talk when eating anyway, it's not ladylike or mannerable. We were taught to eat and sit properly at the table. There would be no slouching or elbows on the table, and you are to hold your spoon correctly. Don't stuff your face with food and close your mouth when eating. You also had no say in what you were given to eat. You were to eat whether you liked the meal or not. It wasn't uncommon for girls to sneak disliked food onto another girl's plate. There is always someone who wants more.  

I sat at the end of the table. It came with its advantages. Firstly, I wasn't squished or being elbowed by people. And secondly, I wasn't surrounded by a great people. The negative side to being on the edge was that a various of times I didn't have that much sitting space. I dealt with the slight inconvenience, as it didn't affect me as it did other girls. 

Once everyone was finished, we had a short morning service. Sister Mary Vincent would lead saying something small about moral and core values or we'd review verses or bible stories. Sometimes, it was a bit of both. To be honest, the catholic religion didn't connect with me well. I didn't feel close to the saints. I wish I had a better connection. I always questioned it. Why did this saint do that? Why did he do this? Can God hear me? 

When will my prayers be answered? 

Should I pray to Mary or to God? Does it matter who? Why is Mary so glorified? She didn't die for our sins. I scoffed. 

Around 9:00 P.M. Can't wait for chores. 

The short service was over, so chores commenced. We started on any chores we had before school started. I had to mop and deeply scrub the floors after school. I had done other jobs, but scrubbing and mopping are my most common jobs. School was often taught inside of the orphanages by paid tutors, teachers, or the sisters taught us themselves. Any chores that weren't finished would be continued after school was over. We just start them now as a head start.