The Coldest Winter

part the second

"What were you thinking, Angie?"

He sounds so patronizing. I am instantly frustrated. "You know I'm bad at speeches. And you also know," I continue, dumping Snow rather abruptly onto the carpeted floor, "that I despise that nickname."

Emer smiles -- charmingly, I assume. I don't actually see him smile. I just know him well enough to feel the charmingness punctuate his sentences. If only his confidence was contagious. "My dear sister. You hate that name when other people try it on you. But I invented it, so I reserve the right to use it whenever I like."

"Hmph." I move to the mirror. He leans easily on the doorframe behind me.

"I'm not saying your strategy is wrong." He shrugs. "A couple of marriages ought to do the trick nicely. Although I do hope you aren't planning to make our five-year-old sister a child bride." 

My reflection glares at his reflection. "A few are exempt. Obviously. It's not like this is a new idea. I've been planning it for... well, close to a year now, I suppose. There are some easy matches to be made. And I know it doesn't feel fair to them, to take away their choice in the matter. But I don't know what else to do, so I just... tried to make it sound like I knew what I was talking about and hope that they will fall in line." 

Emer sighs. 

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"What?"

"You making that disappointed sound. Like I'm a little bedraggled dog that needs a bath."

"Interesting choice of metaphor. You want to intimidate them into obedience, Angel. You want to make it seem like you are in control, that you have it all figured out--"

"Yes! And what is so wrong with that?"

"Just... oh, Angel. It just makes you seem so unapproachable. They are children, most of them. Mitri and Kai and Lemon. Mace and Xan. They're just kids. You might get through to them better if you seemed a bit more, I don't know, human." 

I laugh. "Human? I don't seem human to you? Then what am I, precisely?" 

"You're queen. You're cold. You're power. And those are good things to be, I'll give you that. Good things to be when you're at war. When you're attacking your enemies. When your people need you to be strong. But we aren't your enemies, Angel. We are your sisters and brothers."

"You're so good at the heartfelt speech thing, Emer. Pity you weren't born the oldest."

He smiles again, a tinge of sadness flickering at the corners of it. "No, Angel. Nobody wants to be in that place." 

"Of course not."

"So," he pushes off the doorframe, moving towards the couch. "Tell me more about this plan you've been concocting for a year. What lovely lady am I being married off to?"

I pause, awkwardly, in the middle of braiding my hair. Turn around to look him in the eyes. "You have, uh, a bit of a reputation, I'm afraid." 

He raises his eyebrows. "Me?"

With a huff, I continue braiding. So much for being sensitive about it. "I couldn't seem to find any... eligible young... ladies... close to your age that haven't already... gotten to know you. Rather well."

"Ah. How unfortunate."

"Very."

"So I am, it would seem, on the list of the exempt."

"Sadly. If you weren't quite so... prolific, you'd make a great catch."

"Oh, let's be honest. I'm still a great catch and you know it." He leans back on the couch, spreading his arms wide across the back. And he isn't wrong. He's got the incredibly dark hair, the beautiful slanted eyes, the perfect, porcelain skin. And the charisma. And... a four year old. 

I turn back to the mirror. "I found a good match for Xei. We talked it over already and he's amenable."

"Ohhh, so some people got to approve their prospective mates? I see."

"It's Xei, Emer."

"Mmm."

"He's... you know I talk to him about everything. And his situation is uniquely... difficult." 

"How so?" Emer sounds genuinely intrigued and I wonder for a moment if I'm being unwise. But I tell him anyway. 

"Not all the marriages I've arranged are... entirely... altruistic." 

His eyebrows flicker upward. "I see."

"Some of them are," I press on, "but some of the older ones, I... well. I thought it might be good to have eyes are ears in places that have historically..."

"Been our sworn enemies?"

"Not been on the best terms with us, yes."

"Who for Xei, then?"

"Calla."

"Oh, sweet gods."

I cringe. "Bad?"

"She's terrifying."

"I know. But Xei... if anyone could actually soften her cold, dead heart, it would be him, wouldn't it?"

Emer chuckles. "Well, according to you, he isn't seducing her to soften her cold, dead heart. He will simply be there to hear all her secrets and disrupt all her plots."

"That isn't quite what I said, was it? I've told him already, we needn't exactly go through with the marriages in all cases. Maintaining the appearance of a suitor, a bit of wooing here and there, perhaps some vague proposals... that should be enough to hold off any imminent threats, shouldn't it?"

"Angel, you frighten me. You are positively a heartless machine."

Pride and hurt dance a tiny jig together in my heart at his words. What do I want more, to be feared or to be loved? My head says one thing, my heart another. "Thank you," I tell him coolly. "But like I said. I've not entrusted any of the children with anything truly sensitive. Just Xei, and... myself."

I can feel Emer smirking. "Oooh..."

"Do not start with me, little boy."

His laugh, unlike his confidence, is contagious. "And what do you plan to do about our sweet little Kai? And our absolutely insane little Lemon?" 

"I have found nice, stable gentlemen, near their ages. Nearby kingdoms that are friendly to us. Nothing complicated, certainly nothing dangerous."

"Lemon will not be pleased to hear that." 

I frown deeply, tying off my braid and scooping Snow -- and her doll -- back into my arms. "I don't particularly care what pleases Lemon, to be quite honest." 

"You are too hard on her." His voice is gentle, and that is the sternest reprimand of all. I know he feels that they are kindred spirits in some ways. But he is at least sweet and well-mannered in his seductions and flirtations, and Lemon is decidedly not. 

I decide to plow on instead of dwelling on the comment. "Emilie is married, Lucia is... unwell. But I found nice girls for Xan and Mace. Even Mitri."

Emer hops up from my couch and trails me out the door and down the hallway, trotting to keep up with my long strides. "But Mitri is only fourteen, Angel." He keeps his voice to a low hiss, lest any nosy siblings overhear us. 

I match his volume. "It isn't set utterly in stone. And fourteen isn't so far from sixteen, which is technically when it's legal to be engaged. They can wait a while and decide when they are older. For now, it puts the idea of alliance -- and not war -- in everyone's minds. We are potential friends, not a potential threat. If we play our cards right."

Emer whistles under his breath. "You are a force to be reckoned with, sister-queen."