DARKNESS WITHIN THE SUN

Chapter 4: A STROKE OF PAINFUL WIND

Chan watched in horror as Felix's steps faltered and he fell down. Chan didn't mean to really hurt the younger boy, he couldn't think of doing so even in his dream, Felix was the light of his life but he was just so angry in that moment, months long anger and frustration that he had been stewing on, came out of him like a bursting volcano and the person that he least wanted to hurt ended up getting the most of the blunt force of his anger.
The moment his anger subsided Chan felt nothing but regret and dread that spread over his entire being. He had ignored the rational part of his brain that told him that Felix must have been suffering with something, which was why he couldn't give his best because the younger was know to give his absolutely everything to any task he was assigned to, so might have had a reason to it and Chan was to be blamed for it as him being the lover, the other half of the freckled teen as he calls himself and couldn't be bothered to find out the reason for the struggles of the younger, it was him to be blamed in the first place as he ignored the boy and did not paid enough attention or gave him enough time to approach him talk to him, But instead of it all, the irrational part of him did the damage to the boy he loves the most and he doesn't know if the younger boy would forgive him or even Minho would ever forgive him for treating his precious younger brother like he did.

Chan was having a fight with his conscience deep in his mind, before his attention was brought back to reality with Hyunjin's panicked voice. The worry in Hyunjin's eye turned into fear as Chan told he hated it. Even from his perspective it sounded like the older hated his predicament of their relationship and knowing Felix like he does, he knows his inner demon must have told him that it was him that chan hated and just for that reason Hyunjin really want to go up to the leader and give him an earful but he felt the younger boy in his arm needed his full attention therefore he hold the slumped boy close to his chest he realized his breathing was very irregular and quickened, hurried he pulled back and hold Felix face, he sees his eyes are glazed and unfocused.
" I think he's having a panic attack to help him lie down properly" Han pipes from where he is standing by the sofa with Changbin's arm around him, sounding very distressed and almost close to tears at the situation in front of him.

"Felix ? Felix baby please calm down !! you gonna pass out if you don't get your breathing under control baby please " Hyunjin himself sounded like he was barely holding his own tears as he wiped the tears that rolled down the cheek of the half unconscious boy in his arm and tried to ease him.

"Changbin call manager nim tells him to hurry up" Minho lost his cool composure upon seeing his younger brother fainting cause him to panic, he immediately went to him and began looking over the younger lee.
" Hyunjin what happened to him, you were by his side right?" Minho asked the taller male ungently.
" y-you both were screaming so loudly I thought Felix was scared I got c-close to him he was looking very p-pale and was swaying on his feet, I supported him and sat him down on floor when I noticed he was b-bleeding through his nose, I gave him a my towel, then he went to reach out to chan hyung when he heard him say he hate him and then fainted" Hyunjin now had tears falling down his face as he tells Minho about what had transpired when the two older members were busy clawing at each others head.
" thank you Hyunjin-ah you did great by being by his side, now calm down okay Lix will be okay manager nim is coming over soon" Minho tries his best to calm down the distressed member although he himself was panicking really hard on the inside but he knew his member need him the most right now as the leader they were supposed to lean on was stuck like a statue in few steps away from them, but he ignored that and paid all his attention to boy on the floor.

Chan was frozen on the spot, all he could focus on was his lover was fighting hard to just breathe his face was contorted into pain and anguish, hearing the boy he loves with his entire existence whimper out painful groan made him feel like someone was smashing his heart, he regretted saying all those awful things to at him he knew how sensitive Felix was about his insecurities and Chan threw all his insecurities, his fears at his face. Chan knew he rubbed the salts on the younger's wound where it hurts the most. He couldn't make himself come up with the courage to go forward and help his lover. He doesn't feel like he deserves to comfort the boy after hurting him and being the reason for all the pain the boy was suffering.