Phone Sex Operator ➢ [LiLo]✅

➂

Scene 4: Filthy Pleasure office, 7:00pm

LOUIS: (adjusts telephone headset and is ready to talk to costumers. Presses the button to take calls) "Hello and welcome to Filthy Pleasure sëx hotline. How can I satisfy you?"

NIALL: (yells) "Answer your cellphone you wanker!"

LOUIS: (rolls eyes) "You know I turn my phone off when I'm working Niall and you are across from me, you could've walked."

NIALL: (yawns) "I was to lazy to walk all the way to your office and I'm still buzzed from being drunk. I shouldn't have drank so much beer."

LOUIS: "And you didn't invite me? Thanks a lot Niall. I thought you were my drinking buddy."

NIALL: "I was invited by my best friend Liam."

LOUIS: (eyes widen, curious) "Liam? Liam Payne?"

NIALL: "Yes, how do you know him?"

LOUIS: "I chatted with him during my phone sëx conversations."

NIALL: "He couldn't stop talking about you. How sorry he felt for judging your job."

LOUIS: (shrugs) "I don't care what he thinks about me. I gave him his sëxual desire and I hanged up."

NIALL: "He told me that he misses you." (lies)

LOUIS: (caught off guard) "Liam really said that?"

NIALL: "I may have been drunk and touched the bartenders boob, and gotten hit for that, but I know what I heard from Liam's mouth. He totally like you." (lies again)

LOUIS: (bites lips) "What does this Liam Payne look like?"

NIALL: (babbles) "Has a cute buzz cut and very muscular. He sometimes gets in this daddy protective mode. He looks out for people a lot and I admire Liam for that, but don't tell him I said that, or I'll piss in your beer."

LOUIS: (chuckles) "I won't and can you tell me about what he does for a living?"

NIALL: "Absolutely nothing. His family are extremely wealthy and have been successful for years doing boring business stuff."

LOUIS: (confused) "Someone who's that attractive from what you describe and he's also wealthy. Why is Liam single?"

NIALL: (sighs) "Liam's more hesitant to be with someone. He doesn't want to get hurt and since his family has a shït loads of money. People will try to use Liam for their selfish ways.

LOUIS: (suspicious) "Wait a minute, did you influence Liam to call me up so I could have phone sēx with him?"

NIALL: (whispers) "Maybe."

LOUIS: (mutters annoyed) "Why do you keep on meddling in my dating life."

NIALL: (sarcastic) "What dating Life? Your last relationship was not even real, even though it was five years ago. I suggested Liam could get his twelve inch cøck off by you and somehow, you two guys could have some chemistry."

LOUIS: (sarcastic) "You should've told me instead of lying to me and coming from the person that gets seven days of different dïck in a week. Don't worry about my personal life."

NIALL: "I was trying to hook you up with one of my closest friends and I was hoping that you would like Liam enough to give him a chance."

LOUIS: (laughs bitterly) "Do you honestly think I have a chance with Liam? I work as a phone sëx operator and he clearly is disappointed at my lifestyle of choice.

NIALL: "All I'm saying is try to be open minded."

LOUIS: (attitude) "You should take your advice and find someone for yourself, instead of sleeping with random people."

NIALL: "You can kindly fück off Louis. I'm trying to be a good friend by bringing one of my best mates into your life. If you want to be stubborn prick and be alone forever then be my guest."

LOUIS: (dramatic groans) "Are you done parenting me Niall?

NIALL: "No."

LOUIS: "Hang up, so I can work."

NIALL: (taunts) "Scared of a little argument? Always the coward one when I confront you on things."

LOUIS: (pissed off) "So you going to pick a fight with me? What you gonna do? Fight me Niall! Just do your fooking job! You fooking loser!" (Hangs up call)

LOUIS: (calm himself down and picks up a call from a costumer) "Hi and welcome to Filthy Pleasure sëx hotline."

HARRY: (clears throat) "Hello my name is Harry Styles, what a lovely day outside, isn't it?"

LOUIS: "Yeah sure. What kind of sëxual favors I can do for you Harry?"

HARRY: (amused) "Would you like to hear a joke?"

LOUIS: (impatient, but purring voice) "Is it a dirty joke?"

HARRY: "Not really, but here it goes. My friend's bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast! Ha! Get it!" (laughs)

LOUIS: (not amused) "..... Yeah sure. Are you naked big daddy?"

HARRY: "No, but do you want to hear another joke?"

LOUIS: (extremely annoyed, but trying to remain calm) "Okay."

HARRY: When Peter Pan punches, they Neverland! I crack myself up"

LOUIS: "Just so you know, that you are being charge for this conversation."

HARRY: "This isn't the bible study group hotline?"

LOUIS: "No! Clearly I said this is the Filthy Pleasure sēx hot line." (Sassed)

HARRY: (whispers) "Your are being extremely mean! I must talk to your supervisor immediately."

LOUIS: (hissed) "Go suck a dïck Harry and hang up. You've waisted my time already."

HARRY: (calm voice) "Dïck is a bad word and now I want a apology."

LOUIS: (laughs bitterly) "You wasted five minutes my time, but thanks for the free five bucks."

HARRY: (grumbles incoherently) "All the fücking love. H. Oh and that bible study thing was a joke and it was funny! (Hangs up)

LOUIS: (pulls off phone headset and puts both hands on his face, and sighs) "I really need some damn Starbucks. What a dreadful day."

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Comment #NourryArgument if you like this chapter.

Dedication: SmexyCrazyMofos

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