We Survived The Monsters

The beginning

My name is Angel and this is my story. I was 14 and my parents had finally split up. It was supposed to be a good thing and at the time it was. My dad was very aggressive and liked to hurt us when he was drunk and high on drugs. My mom was always yelling and putting me down especially after they split up I never understood why she hates me so much and I still don't. I had an older brother and little brother that lived with me and a sister I hadn't seen in years because my parents separated us and wouldn't allow me to see her. She tried to get custody of me when I was twelve because things was so bad and I begged her to help me. The court sided with my mom because we wasn't sisters by blood. When my parents split up I chose to live with my mom because I didn't want to be around drugs and alcohol any more. We never had a relationship she only cared for me and my little brother when it benefitted her. She favored my older brother James. Mom had a new boyfriend before she kicked dad out the day after he left mom had her boyfriend there we already knew him. I had a bad feeling right then anytime I was around him I felt uncomfortable. I thought it was because we knew him before when he sold drugs to my dad.

I was about to be fifteen when all this happened. All I could do was hope things was going to get better. Something my dad said when he found out should have mattered to my mom he said he had past charges for touching a minor but they was dropped. He told Dylan that if he ever touched me that he would regret it that was the only time my dad acknowledged I was his daughter and it seemed like he cared. I should have run away that day I don't know where I could have went but I should have just ran and never looked back.

About a month passed and we moved to another county so I would have to move to yet another school but I told mom I wouldn't move again I wanted to at least finish high school at one school not four or five. We moved constantly growing up and I never bothered to unpack because I knew we would just move again. She just rolled her eyes and walked away Jesse got approved to stay at his school because it was his senior year and he was about third in his class and did sports year round. He was always the golden child and popular in school. That year I finally spoke again when a met Mariah. I had stopped talking after my uncle passed away my eighth grade year. It was my sophomore year and a new school I just felt like I could talk to her so I did. We became very close in school and I tried out for soccer I was finally getting the chance to play a sport I chose. I made the junior varsity team I was so happy I made it. The soccer team made me feel like I finally belonged somewhere I was finally getting myself back to normal as long as I wasn't home. At school I was fine and happy but the minute I was home I hid in my room after cleaning the house because me and mom always fought and there was always yelling and fighting my whole life was this way. I hated it I just wanted a normal living family.

I was bad about cutting and I'm not proud of it but that summer things got so bad just before my birthday. I wanted to die. I didn't want to fight anymore I couldn't wash what he did away I was fifteen I was supposed to be turning sixteen the next day my sweet sixteen. It was supposed to be a happy moment in my life but instead the night terrors begun. I had flashbacks all the time but I couldn't tell anyone but the anxiety, PTSD, nightmares, and panic attacks was getting harder and harder to cover up so I told myself that if things couldn't just go away and soon I would make it go away. I would make myself disappear I would kill myself. This time I would succeed nobody would stop me.

All my plans in life was gone. I had my whole future planned out and that day July second changed it all. All my plans college, my career, the shelter and rescue program I wanted to create it was all gone and I never got the chance to do any of it. I didn't know at this time how much of an effect that day had on the rest of my life until early December.