Supernatural End - Carry On Episode (Destiel Canon)

Part 10

Claire is face to face with the Thoughtform, who has its hand in her chest.

"No! Claire!"Dean shouts.

Before he have the chance to do anything, she set the Thoughtform in fire, the thing simple disappear.

They run to her. "Are you okay?"

She breathing heavy and scared but seems okay.
Everyone coming running from the house, Kaia faster than anyone. "Claire!" She shouts.

"I'm okay" Claire states.

"What happened?" Jody asks.

"The Thoughtform. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come here" Dean realizes. He just putted them in danger. He kept doing this, putting people in danger...

"Sam, the ritual you said, do you get it?" Alex asks.

"Yes, but we need some ingredients and I'm not sure if we get time to gather it all."

"I don't think we do." Claire is still holding the stick she had lighted up with fire, she looks in a direction near the trees. Everybody follows her eyes. The Thoughtform is staring them.

In one second it's there in another it's trying get Claire again. Dean is throw back, falling in the ground.

"Hey" he shouts standing up "its me that you want"

The Thoughtform slowly looks back at him and smiles, before it gets to him  Sam shoot at it and it disappears again.

"Let's get inside" Dean suggests turning to them, when he feels something in his chest through his back.

"Dean!" Cas shout and disappear from his sight, some light seems to lighten the night on Dean's back and than he's able to breath again. Cas is on sight again, looking at him, worried.

"I'm okay." Dean says "how are we gonna stop this thing?"

No one has an answer. But at least it seems that the Thoughtform had gave them some time. They run back to the front of the house, when the cars are parked. Everyone looking around. When Dean's car turn it on.

"Who is in the car?" Sam asks.

Dean put his hand inside his jacket pocket and find the car keys, showing them to Sam and everyone he states what everyone had probably realized right now "no one."

The car drives itself fast in their direction, Sam and Dean jump each for a side, together with the others, in last minute, the car crashes in the front of Jody's house, breaking some parts of it.

"Son of a bitch!" Dean yells at the wind "is everybody okay?"

Before anyone can answer, everybody is toss in a direction, falling in the ground or against the car and being kept there. Dean is tossed against a part of a wood pillar broken by the car, he feels a sting pain in his back and chest even though the Thoughtform is right before him. He feel he can't move, the thing is keeping him there like is doing with everyone. It gets closer to Dean.

He has to think, he has to find a way, because he wanted to live and because he has to protect them, after finishing him up, it would hurt Claire and who know who else, it was his creation, his responsibility. He has to find a way...

"Dean" Sam yells him "it's feeding on your guilty, on your pain. You created it... you can destroy it in the same way"

How? He knew how, but... he looks at Sam, Sammy his younger brother, remembering all things he did to keep him safe, and he didn't regret of any of it, it was worth, to keep him safe it was worth.

He looks at Jody, at the girls, people he cared about, people who cared about him. He thinks about  Jack, he almost can feel them around them, like they promised they would. He thinks about his mother, about Charlie, Kevin, Bobby, Ellen, Jo, his father, all people who was, who is part of his family, who believed in him, who loved him. He own them his life one way of another and should live it the best he can for them.

He looks at Cas, who gave up everything for him, whose world changed because of him, Cas believed on him since the beginning. For him, for Sam, for them, he should believe im himself too.

He looks back at the Thoughtform "You won't win. I forgive myself, do you hear me? I forgive myself" he repeats louder "I did my best to everyone, I did my best for Sammy, I did my best for those that I loved and I failed, if I failed them... it wasn't my fault because I know I did all I could to keep them safe, I forgive myself for all times I felt I failed someone. A lot of people died by my hands, innocent or not, directly or indirectly, but that's not who I'm, I'm not a murderer, I'm not hatred, I made mistakes and I'll never be able to repair them, but the best thing I can do, the closest thing I can do to repair is to live, to live better, to do do better, to be better."

He looks at Cas "Cas... he was right, I shouldn't feel guilty for not saying something, there was a lot going on and I... and it was too much for me because I was losing him, and I'm sorry, I'm sorry Cas, I'm sorry I hadn't be able to say what you deserved to hear"

He looks back at the Thoughtform "But I forgive myself for that, I forgive myself for everything. I did my best. Always. And I'll keep doing. And I'm proud of myself."

The Thoughtform keeps coming closer and closer slowly. Dean doesn't know anymore what he could say to destroy it, but somehow he was feeling less desperate, more lighthearted, he closes his eyes feeling that each of his word was true.

The Thoughtform pierce his chest with its hand, in this right moment he feels like he's letting go, letting go all his guilt, about Cas, about Sam, about everything, letting go all his hate for himself. He feels for the first time that he could become something that he would love, he realizes that he was truly proud of himself. And that he was somewhat free.

The pain and pressure in his chest is released and he opens his eyes to see the Thoughtform disappearing in flames and light, like ghost do, and he knows it was gone for good. And even though a different type of pain on his back and chest tells him something is wrong, he smiles.