Not My Type

17

∆ Omniscient ∇
Beverly Hills,CA

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What happened yesterday no one can change.what happens today, you can only experience and what happens tomorrow you can create.

Charlie couldn't change what kamari does as a career but she could blame him for keeping it a secret. It's like she was a open book to him but he didn't never really tell her much as she thought he did. She had to think for two now, if he gets hurt by other people, how would she know who did it? If he goes to war, how would she know to be kept safe? If things go left then she will also be involved. Plus she never want their child to grow up without a father because he passed away or in jail. It's a lot what " if's" as a mother she had to think about.

Kamari snatched the folder out charlie hand before speaking " look I know you might be upset or I don't know what you are right now, you been giving me a hard time and that's cool I will always be the blame but just don't make this a argument too charlie. Please don't , and your the only person who knows about my "job" so I need you to not say anything"

" Kamari you never take accountability and yes I am going to make a fuse, the day I married you that's why them men were there? they saw me kamari ! If I was hidden I wouldn't have cared but I'm not hidden and now we are having a child. business partners don't stay partners for ever."

Kamari never thought about his life with a child, he didn't plan on having one no time soon until he met Charlie. Now that he has a child on the way he have to put more focus on his business so that nothing ever goes wrong for the two.

" Charlie I understand that, but you and my child will be the last two people on earth ever getting hurt. I haven't went at it with another man since I been in the game because I'm not a grimy ass nigga and I don't see me becoming one, I let you be bratty, angry , hurt and all that but just don't push me away when I'm trying with you Charlie and your not meeting me halfway because you might just push me away for good" kamari walked out leaving Charlie dumbfounded.

She played the strong woman act but now she's just being plain ole bitchy. He was tired of the complaining when he does everything she ask for. He was tired of feeling like he wasn't doing enough when he keeps apologizing with just a thought he had. People had thoughts all the time but he didn't even touch katyln, they was barely was at dinner for 30 minutes.

It's okay to feel hurt but what else did she want from him? He already trying to give her the world.

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"Well why are you giving him a hard time?" She couldn't answer that question. He been kissing her ass since they rekindle but now she was just being mean without wanting nothing in return. If kamari leave for good Charlie would honestly feel sick to her stomach.

" I'm scared if I give him another chance he won't be sure of his feelings and go try it again. I'm just scared, scared of running when things go wrong , scared of feeling like I'm not good enough we all have that one side of us that feel guilt and shame just for being ourselves" she responded back Lay.

Humans live with guilt inside of them, no matter how much you say you don't care about things, you eventually care about something that leaves you with guilt. Kamari was already beating himself up alone about his actions but for Charlie repeatedly do things to him already add on to the hisself doubt he was doing inside his head to himself.

It's okay to forgive people and if you don't want to be with them then don't be with them but don't make person feel miserable when you free to leave anytime you want.

" it seems like your trying use your insecurities on him Charlie, if you didn't love him or wasn't upset you wanted be treating him the way you are right now, he keep telling you he would leave you and you can have everything but you don't want that either. And you keep bringing up your age your soon about to be twenty Charlie, you are a adult by law so stop using that as excuse for your childish actions and really say how you feel. All you doing is pushing someone who is trying away and that's not cool man." Lay could be chill but she can also be brutally honest. She didn't agree with how Charlie was treating kamari because even though she may like girls, she still can tell a good person rather it's a female or male.

" you right lay thank you for listening" after that they hung up
The call, Charlie laid down rubbing her stomach feeling it's her turn to feel The guilt.

" hey little person, mommy doesn't know what you are yet but I will be finding out soon. I don't care what your are honestly or who you turn out to become but just know you was made with love even if when you come and me and your dada not together you still was created with love that maybe only we needed to make you and not keep for us. Should I give him a chance ?becau-" she stop mid sentence feeling her baby kick when she asked the question. She thought it was funny how they kicked right after her question. " I hear you baby, thanks for always listening to me , I heard babies also can hear our thoughts I hope you only hear positive ones and not the sad ones. Because you truly are my happiness. I pray to never treat you How I was and listen to you every time you speak"

Kamari stood outside Charlie door he was about to walk in to apologize until he listened to her talk to their baby . What was he even apologizing for this time? For his career before she came? Kamari never questioned his actions until he met Charlie it's like the two was breaking down each other without even noticing it but she wasn't noticing the things she was doing to him. Her being pregnant made her bratty and she wants so bad not to be like her mom that she running her lover away like she did until he finally left and she chased after him. Just because someone in love with you and trying Doesn't mean they won't leave because they Will if you forcing them too .

Kamari got up hearing her go silence but before he could turn the knob Charlie already was "can we talk" they said at once.

Was Charlie going loose the only person who showed her she deserve to live ?