As It Was (h.s)

ii

If I was a bluebird, I would fly to you

***

"Why was he here?" Cole said as we ate dinner together in our dining room. He sat on one side of the table. I sat on the other. It was our nightly ritual.

"I told you why he was here." I said, taking a bite of the pasta he made. "We just needed to clear some things up."

"Aria, I'm not stupid." Cole's voice is calm and quiet, despite the rough-sounding words. he cools them down quite a lot. That's one of the things I've always loved about him. He makes tense situations less tense.

"Are you calling me a liar?" I ask, trying not to sound hurt.

"No, baby. Not at all. I just want to know if maybe you under-exaggerated some things." he shrugs, not making eye contact. "I mean he was sitting right in front of you I'd understand why you would."

"Cole, I'm being honest with you," I say. "Nothing was under-exaggerated. The way I said it was the way that it was."

He doesn't respond. Just a nod that tells me he doesn't fully believe me. "How long have you been seeing him."

"What?!" I drop my fork the second he says the words. "Cole what the fuck. I'm not seeing Harry. You're my fucking husband. I'm not cheating on you and I can't even believe you would suggest that I would."

"That's not what I meant." He tells me. "I just meant how long have you been talking to him? Since you know, recently. Because as far as I knew, you guys broke up years ago."

"We did," I clear up. "And today was the first time I'd spoken to him in years."

Cole lets out a quiet hmph sound that tells me absolutely nothing about what he's thinking. I don't like the way he said that earlier. I don't like the way he's acting. He's unreadable and it's pissing me off.

"Thank you for dinner," I say standing with my plate. "But I'm not hungry anymore. I'm gonna go shower."

I take my plate into the kitchen and start to put it in a container to save for later. "Aria," Cole says, and I look up at him. "You're just not gonna eat it?"

I shrug. "I'll take it for lunch tomorrow."

"You barely even ate today." He sounds like he's getting annoyed with my behavior. "Don't just fucking put it away, you need to eat."

"I'm not hungry."

"You need food in your body-"

"I said I'm not hungry. If I get hungry later tonight, then I'll eat. But right now, I have no appetite. I appreciate you making dinner, I really do, but I just can't eat it right now." I finish dumping his dinner into the plastic container, seal it with a lid and then clean my plate.

Cole shakes his head and puts another bite of food into his mouth, staring down at the table while he does it.

Today was too much. I need it to end right now.

...

"Aria?" Sandy said through the landline phone after I picked it up. "Someone's here for you. Can I send him up?"

I lean back in my desk chair. "I guess, who is it?"

"Uhm..." She mumbles. "It's uh...Mr. Styles, Aria."

The mention of his name leaves a gasp in my mouth. I clear my throat in hopes of covering it. "Yeah, go ahead and send him in."

"Alright," Sandy says, then much quieter. "Remember the code word for security is tiny penis, okay?"