Lovesick

Chapter I

With his focus already split between the food on his plate and the conversation he was having on the phone, Lucas couldn't be bothered to pay any attention to me, who was sitting right in front of him in the nearly empty fast-food restaurant where we always used to go for lunch together. I had been staring at him for several minutes, which normally would have compelled him to ask what the hell I was looking at, or at least give me a blank stare that conveyed that same message. But because he was too distracted to even look in my general direction, he hadn't noticed. I was munching on my fries to keep myself somewhat occupied, to try to distract myself as the bitterness was undoubtedly starting to show on my face. I was feeling increasingly frustrated with the situation, but I didn't want to make it too obvious.

On the other end of the line was a girl's voice I thought I recognised, though I couldn't really place it. She clearly seemed to be losing patience as much as I was. "If you would just give me the reason—"

"Okay, you really want one? You're annoying as hell."

Arguments like those happened all the time. Lucas's latest conquest was giving him an earful over the phone for ending things with her over text, and not even being courteous enough to state a reason. Of course, she just had to call on a weekend, a time of the week that I deemed almost sacred as it was a rare opportunity for me to have lunch with Lucas without some other friends or groupies of his inviting themselves to our table. It was hard enough to get some alone time with him, considering there were always other people inviting him to other, probably way more exciting places, but then, there were also the constant phone calls. There was always something going on with him, some drama that I had to witness from the sidelines. It usually involved some girl being mad at him.

"How can you say that?" she hissed. "What did I do? You're seriously breaking up with me out of the blue without even—"

"Breaking up?" he repeated in disbelief. He took a bite of his sandwich and continued talking with his mouth full. A bad habit of his, one of many. "Were we even together? When did that happen?"

"Oh, you are such an asshole!"

"I never said I was dating you. You think my standards are that low? Anyway, are you done throwing a fucking tantrum over this?"

Why did I always have to listen to such conversations? On the one hand, I was glad that he felt comfortable enough around me to never feel the need to hide anything, not even things that anyone would reasonably want to keep private. If it was just the two of us, he would always put everyone on speaker. There were no secrets that he couldn't share with me. It made me kind of happy. At the same time, having to hear the way he treated the people who loved him, how little value he saw in such feelings... well, it always made for a pretty brutal reality check. Never failed to remind me that I could never, ever, find myself in that position.

"Fuck you," she said after a while. "You better not call me ever again."

She hung up right after saying that, but Lucas still felt the need to reply. "Like I would." He didn't even spare his phone one last glance before putting it back in his pocket, and I watched him as he took another bite of his sandwich, completely unbothered. Sometimes, it seemed like nothing could affect him. Like his relationships with others were about as valuable to him as used tissues.

"Amber, right?" I tried to ask as nonchalantly as possible. "That was her name?"

"I think so?" I gave him an admonishing look, and he stifled a laugh. "Yeah, Amber."

"She seemed pretty mad," I remarked.

"Your observation skills never cease to impress me, Cal."

"Aren't you tired of it? Of things always ending like that?"