Identity Illusion

Chapter 6

The pain in her neck was the first thing noticed, quickly followed by the lively birds above and around her. Amelia would have never allowed such a peaceful sound. Claire gave a deep sigh and stretched her arms and curled her toes, pointing her feet inside her boots. Several places in her body cracked, wrists, ankles, toes, her knee caps, even all the way down her spine that gave a lingering wave of comfort flooding back.

The sun rays looked down at her like looking through lace. She lifted her hand and made her fingers dance in the light as though on a stage in front of a full house. This was the first time that her mind was so at ease and nerves weren't playing a part with her. The quiet fight with herself not to think was worth the struggle while the birds and now calm breeze taking her into her childish dreams.

Her hand fell onto her stomach and made her hunger become announced. Could she really not just enjoy this one moment? Her groan had been louder then she intended when she sat up and just like that, the symphony of birds was gone from her. Now she wasn't looking up at the sky, instead in her thoughts while staying on the ground, still.

Arms resting at her side, it was as though she was in a meditation pose. Face blank and breathing slow and calm. Finally the cold wind began to pick up so she did the same with her things and head home. For some reason she felt the need to head back rather quickly and check on things. She was still groggy so the walk caused her to stumble and branches to hit her face. The amount of scratches she would find would surprise her.

The way back was always faster she felt and the house was in sight as Claire hurried to get her key and step inside the warm house. Making coffee to hopefully feel her toes and brush through the knotted mess of hair. It was just as she left it but the air felt disturbed. Invaded. Maybe someone had just knocked at the door while she was away to ask her something. Frankly she didn't care right now to figure it out. But seeing her laptop became her next goal as it was already open in front of her.

Out of the corner of her eye lay her acceptance papers, still the thought of furthering her education brought butterflies and excitement to her stomach. Was she ready to leave and make more adult choices besides what to make for dinner? But the knowledge she was lacking...she wanted it so badly that it hurt sometimes. The Internet was slower then normal as she thought, and finally the email came up, her mothers response now in her possession. She was full of excitement but also disappointment. She had missed a chance to perhaps talk to her. Maybe not face to face but replying within minutes sounded so perfect.

Now that opportunity was gone and while she read the hope for another chance began to make her hopeful again. She read it twice, three times and almost wanted to save it so she could read it again but hear it in her mom's voice. Second thoughts kept her from doing that. Instead she replied to say that all was going well and she was glad to finally hear from her. For some reason mentioning the hike didn't seen necessary as she typed more about missing her and can't wait to see her again. The information about someone coming to the house concerned her but gave as well a gratitude that things would be fixed in the house.

Her final words in the email were simply saying how proud she was of her mom for doing what was right and how much she loved her. Proofreading, she scanned her words and then sent it, deciding to leave the laptop on in case her mom happened to reply today while she looked over things needed for her science courses. Claire stood and stretched her arms high above her while she stood and walked to her room to change out of the dirty clothes and put a towel around her body. A shower sounded perfect to clear her head more and simply relax until a list for the day could be made in her head.

The bathroom was soon filled with steam and her pale body was blotched with red marks from the too hot water. Claire didn't mind as she shaved her legs, bikini area, and under arms. The soap she used smelled so perfect but she couldn't describe as floral exactly. It was a incredibly seductive scent that she wished that entire world could smell like.

She became so relaxed when the water washed the soap down her back that her eyes closed and she leaned against the cool shower wall. The sound of the shower was her focus, the steam cleared her head perfectly. Finally her mother had answered and relief never felt so amazing. Claire sighed again before shutting off the water and stepping onto the soft rug. The cotton towel hung neatly just beside her and the plush feel blanketed her body as she dried off, squeezing the extra water from her hair into the shower and wrapping the towel around her still damp body.

She didn't feel like doing anything today, it wasn't like her to feel lazy as she made it to her room and sat at the edge of her bed. Part of her curtain was open but she didn't really care, no one could see her at this side of the house anyhow. The towel fell from under her arms to resting around her hips, giving her a new sort of freedom and confidence. Claire looked down at her body, free of blemishes except for a small round scar on the side of her stomach that had been from a biking accident where she had flipped over the handle bars and caught the one handle right into her gut, knocking the wind from her and leaving its mark. her father had carried her home but she protested the very idea of seeing a doctor. She had only been eleven and hated the idea of stitches, needles in particular. Even today they scared her. She didn't know why, pain didn't bother her, it was the fact that a object that didn't belong in her body was there.

Her finger trailed around the small circle in remembrance. It was rare for her to think back on memories. She was more of someone who liked to always look forward. That was how her mother was as well. Leaving the scar alone, she removed the towel completely and got off her bed, walking about the room naked and enjoying the simple and natural state. It was time to think up of a new to do list for that day. The lazy feeling was gone as well as the nagging feeling of taking a nap on a comfortable bed as opposed to the ground she had chosen earlier. First she needed to focus on what she needed to study first to get ahead for the science courses. She had recently became a fan of forensics. They idea of piecing together stories and mysteries by such small details left behind by forgetful humans was so exciting to her. She took one trimester during her senior year of high school and she nearly stayed awake every night reading the textbook.

Eventually she was falling behind on other classes and was forced to stop and keep up with what she was taught at the time about forging signatures, studying different hair follicles such as eye lashes and common hair and fiber lab tests. She felt excited again that she couldn't keep still. Maybe she would ask her mother if she was alright if she bought another textbook with the money she sent. She hardly ever spent money for personal interests like clothing and expensive foods. Knowledge was more important to her then personal enjoyment. However there were a few secrets that she kept to herself from her mother that deeply satisfied her. She called it a study instead of what most people would call pleasuring oneself or masturbation. She wanted to focus entirely on how fast her body responded or just how lost into herself she could get until the end.

It was so fascinating to her. The entire world was. And she wanted all of it at her disposal so nothing was a secret and nothing would surprise her. She quickly put on a Pink Floyd shirt belonging to her mother and boy shorts, heading back to the computer and sending her mother a new email.

Mom, Thank you again for the information about the person coming to fix the stuff in the house. I think that there is something wrong with the stove. It doesn't heat up as fast as it did before you left. I haven't used it since I figured this out. I was wondering if you would mind if I ordered a textbook. I want to get some more information about forensics and I think I might be taking a new or another course at least. I really want to learn as much as I can before starting college which I don't think you will object to but I wanted to be certain. I miss you and love you a lot. I hope that everything is going okay and you are safe. Love, Claire.

She read for any errors or details missing and finally sent it, opening up a new tap on Chrome and looking through some sites that sold college level textbooks. Bookmarking ones that sparked her interest and ones she could go back to in case her mother said yes. Within an hour she had found about three different books. One titled Criminalistics: An introduction to Forensic Science that she found on Amazon for $150 and Advances in Fingerprint Technology that she found on Textbook.com. So many were capturing her eye but she was careful with learning what each book contained and what quality they were. She didn't want a book that was paperback and could get ruined easily. And she didn't want a book that only had just enough information to put into the pages but not into her mind. She settled on the two books for now and started to work on getting more things done until the person was to show up and help with what she needed.