The Neighbour

TWENTY-EIGHT

🌷Ana🌷

I wake up in my old bedroom, the set-up exactly as I left it. Even the bed sheets smell the same. Nan always threatened to turn this room into a gym once I left, but it never happened. She may feign toughness at times, but she's a sentimental sis at heart.

The morning sun spills in from the open curtains, drenching the space in daylight. This bedroom reminds me of Mum, despite the fact she never stepped foot in here. Nan and I moved after her death, both of us in dire need of a fresh start. But I decorated the space to feel like her. Back then, I would talk to her as though she could hear me. Fill her in on mundane shenanigans. I'm not sure when I stopped doing that, but it was probably around the time I started dating josh.

"Mum?" I ask, met with silence.

My heart aches.

"I wish you were here."

I close my eyes and pretend she's hugging me from behind. Her body is soft against mine, the smell of peaches overwhelming. I don't even think her perfume was peach scented, but one of my earliest memories with her was making peach jam and since then, I've associated her with that smell.

"Anastasia?"

Nan's voice trickles in from the gap in the door and the gaping hole in my chest immediately vanishes.

"Yeah?"

She elbows her way in, hands full. "I've brought you some ice for your lip."

I instinctively touch the tender flesh, barely registering the pain.

"How's it looking?" I ask.

She sits beside me on the bed, pressing the icepack to my face. "Still swollen to shit."

I laugh, appreciating her honesty.

"How you feeling?" she questions, using her fingers to detangle my hair.

I flinch when she catches a particularly mangled section.

"Okay," I admit.

Her smile doubles the brightness in the room.

"Do you ever talk to Mum?" I ask.

My question is unexpected and I'm not entirely sure how Nan is going to react.

She nods. "Every day."

"Yeah? What do you tell her?"

She climbs under the covers with me, settling in. "I tell her about you. How wonderful you are. How proud of you I am."

My throat closes, overcome with emotion.

"I tell her about Helen and Liam."

"Have you told her about Freddie?" I question.

She smiles, eyes creasing. "Oh, yeah. We're big fans."

I rest my head on her shoulder, momentarily abandoning the icepack.

"She knows all about Charlotte too."

I squeeze her hand from beneath the covers, glad she's been keeping her updated over the years.

"It happened because it happened, Anastasia," says Nan, sensing my inner turmoil.

"Yeah," I say. "It happened because it happened."

The mantra gives me strength and I position the icepack against my lip again, in need of this constant reminder to fuck off.

"It's your book club tonight, isn't it?" I ask.