The Past

Lost again

The two boys were together again for a while until the man broke up with the boy once again, saying he just didn't want to be gay anymore. After everything the boy had done to convince him, he still had doubts about the relationship. So when the boy heard this he repeated his process of research and convincing, until the man agreed again. This was the start of how the boy started to see the pattern that the man seemed to follow however he still couldn't figure out why he was following this pattern.

Eventually the man broke up with the boy again, sending the boy unto a spiral of emotion. He couldn't understand why the man was repeating the same thing over and over again. The boy wasn't able to handle the man so they agreed to block each other and never speak to each other again. Of course the boy suffered everyday trying to accept the decision he had made and he missed the boy and the love that he had never felt before.

So during this time the boy started talking to another boy he found to be extremely hot. The boy full on lusted after the man. When he arrived at a relationship, the boy started to show his true self and the issues he had been hiding. The man would gaslight the boy, blaming him for everything even though all the boy wanted was more time with him. This eventually led to the man blocking the boy and telling him how much of a mistake that he was.

The boy started to approach his lowest point of heartbreak, and was considering the unthinkable. He unblocked his ex, the one he had first loved. He was hoping that the man would help give him purpose one again as the boy felt as if he had none. The man ended up messaging the boy a few days later and they caught up on each others life.

The boy said how much he missed the man telling him everything that had happened. The boy was holding back tears the entire time he spoke to his ex. However after a few days of talking to the man he realized that he seemed different from how he was. The boy felt as if a switch inside the boy had turned off inside his ex.

So the boy investigated trying to find out why he acted this way. The more the boy looked the more he saw what his ex was trying to do. His ex wanted him back not because the loved each other, but because his ex was trying to play with his emotions.

That's when the boy saw it, a sociopath. When the boy was trying to figure out the pattern that his ex had been following, he came across the word, sociopath. To many things that his ex had done related to this word. So he confronted his ex telling him what he found asking if this is what he was. All his ex had to say was "Oh, well." The boy discovered the pattern and what his ex wanted. His ex had wanted to play with the boys emotion because he found it fun.

When the boy realized his ex never loved him and it was all faked he crashed. The boy's emotions had been twisted and abused for another persons enjoyment and it was someone he had trusted more than anyone. The boy as left betrayed and abused by his ex. He couldn't breath, everything he stood for had been broken. He couldn't trust anyone.

The boy would have panic attacks, which seemed like they happened every minute. He just wanted the pain to stop. He was so close to letting everything go, but the boy realized that all it would do is hurt others and he still wanted to help people. So the boy sat down and let his mind go blank. He had no thoughts, no emotions. Everyone he spoke to was speaking to but a shell of who he was.

As the time went by he started to feel again so he decided to talk to people again to distract himself. He joined a ton of groups, and spoke his mind without filter. Everyone seemed to run from him or hated him for the things he said.