until the very end

part 13

“What’s a pretty girl like you doing all alone out here in the dark?”
I immediately grabbed my knife, turning around, before I realised the familiar, sarcastic voice. I sighed, throwing back the capuchon to reveal my face in the pale moonlight.

“Hope.”
Hope smirked wryly as she stepped out of the shadows. “Long time no see.”
“Not long enough, if you ask me.” I put the knife away.

“Nice to see you too.” Hope rolled her eyes. “So? What are you doing here at this suspicious time of the night?”
“Minding my business,” I responded dryly. “You should try it. What about you?”
She shrugged. “Couldn’t sleep.”
I sighed, briefly scanning the dark alleyway. I really didn’t have time for chitchat, especially not with this girl. I just needed to check a couple spot where Aria was most likely to be, before I could go back to keep an eye on Brend and Lucie. The beach was my first try. The girl liked to stare out at the sea when her emotions got the best of her.

Hope lit a cigarette. She hesitated a couple seconds, before asking: “How’s your brother?”
I narrowed my eyes, immediately alert. “Why? Did you do something?”
“Relax, I’m just asking.” She rolled her eyes. “Skyler has a problem with him. I don’t.”
“Well, the two of you basically stick together like flies on syrup, so forgive me if I’m being cautious,” I said.

In the moonlight, I thought I saw the color in her face change for a second. Then she regained her calm as she inhaled the cigarette smoke. “I visited him yesterday, you know.”
“You did what?!” I took a threatening step towards her, immediately alert. “I swear to god, Hope, if you and your psycho bestie did anything to hurt him…”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake.” Hope looked irritated. “I visited him to check on him, Gwen. Because apparently, his own sister was too busy terrorizing a bunch of kids and kissing the Gaiaphage’s feet. I went to check on him, and to ensure he got fed.”
“Do you know where we live?” I raised an eyebrow.

She rolled her eyes. “I spend a lot of time hanging out in the streets at night. You really gotta teach your brother and his friend to be more quiet if you don’t want the wrong people to find you.”
Hope started to walk in the direction of the beach. I hesitated for a moment before walking after her.

“I had a brother too, you know.” Hope inhaled the smoke deeply. “His name was Thomas.”
“Okay.”
“He was seven years younger than me. Our mother… she didn’t really care for us. It was always me and him. I learned how to care for him from a young age. We used to play together, and then I made sure he got fed, and that he went to sleep on time.”
I stayed quiet. This story started to sound awfully familiar.

“Then one day…” Hope swallowed hard. “He was only five. He was playing outside, and I was inside, reading a book. We were living in a pretty rough neighbourhoofd, and I swear, I always kept my eye on him. Always. But just that one moment, I wasn’t looking. And just at that moment… my neighbour walked by. With his dog. A big, uncontrolled dog that was actually supposed to be put down because of his anger and agression. And that dog saw my brother, and he…” Hope couldn’t speak for a moment, agressively blinking back tears. When she spoke again, there was a lump in her throat. “The next thing I heard, was my brother screaming in pain and fear. Before I got outside, it was too late.”
I looked at her. Her fists were clenched. The truth was, I related more to her story than she could know. Brend and I also grew up with only our older sister to care for us. But I wouldn’t let this chick get to me so easily.

“What exactly am I supposed to do with this information?” I asked.
“I’m just saying.” Hope angrily wiped away the tear that was forming in the corner of her eye. “Brend reminds me of my brother. That’s why I’m checking up on him, that’s why I’m making sure he eats, because his own fucking sister only thinks about herself.”
“Do not tell me how to live my life,” I snapped. “You don’t know the lengths I would go to to protect him. And I do make sure he eats. I’m bringing him food every day.”
“Yes, once a day, except when you don’t.” Hope laughed sarcastically. “Do you even pay attention? Last time I saw him, there was barely any meat on his bones. And the worst part is, when I tried to offer him food, at first he wouldn’t accept it, because he was convinced there were other kids who needed it more than he did. He doesn’t think he’s deserving of being fed, of being alive. His problem goes deeper than just what you see at the surface, Gwen. His problems are mental. But you wouldn’t know anything about that.”
I stared at her. In the mirrored water of the sea, I saw the reflection of the mood in my light gray eyes as they pierced into her dark brown ones. “You don’t know everything, Hope. Actually, today he went picking melons with his friend. I haven’t seen him this happy in years. Don’t pretend you know me or my brother.”
“Good.” Hope took a deep, shaky breath, roughly wiping her face once more. “That’s good. I’m sorry, it’s just…” Her voice was nothing more than a whisper. “I… there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to get Thomas back. I can’t let anyone else make the same mistake. Be there for him, that’s all I’m asking. Be there for him as long as you still can.”
I sighed. I didn’t have the energy to argue. Hope’s words stang. Deep down inside, I knew she was probably right. Now that Brend and Lucie were living with me, it should be easier for me to keep them safe, and yet I was pretty much out all day and night, doing my own thing.