As we drove away from Lima, Ohio, I asked my shmoopie where he was taking us. "It's a surprise", he said, putting his finger to my lips. I couldn't wait to see what my harry had in store for me. Just as my mind began to wander, Harry started to saranade me. "Water melon sugar high, water melon sugar high." He is SOOO romantic. The tour bus needed gas so I took the opportunity to use the toilet (I ate a lot of red lobster drive-thru), and when I returned from the toilet the first of many surprises from my harry. He had tampons up his nose, but that wasn't the surprise, he held up the real the surprise. "Here you go love" it was a cat. "I found it in a box behind the kwik Trip". I was about to cry when I realized, it was an orange cat. I know all gingers go to hell, so I had to be on my best game protecting this cat, I wouldn't want anything my harry gave me to suffer. Harry turned on the engine by hot wiring it again and we were on the road, the sound of cars honking mixed with cats screeching put me right to sleep and when I next woke up, I wasn't sure where we were. But I remembered the pizza hut they converted into a scientology church, and I realized I was home.
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"Are we going to my house to meet my mom" I shouted at my honey-bear. "Yes we are love, to meet both your parents" he returned "Oh, you don't know" I was sad "Don't know what?" "I don't actually have two parents, my dad, h-h-he d-d-died in the mafia". "My bad babe" Harry is so sympathetic. "It's ok" I said. I couldn't wait to have harry meet my mom, she would love him so much, but not as much as I love him.
