Utsukushii Kare/ My Beautiful Man [ENGLISH TRANSLATION]

Chapter-2; PART-4: Bitter Sweet Loop

                               

                                       Translator: White Lotus

                                                              ◈ ◈ ◈ ◈

Soon after their summer vacation started, Koyama invited Hira to watch a stage play with him. It appeared to be a play by the theatrical group that Koyama's brother helped out with, and since it was all unofficial productions with mainly graduate students, it was hard to attract an audience, so Koyama was pulled along to assist them in gathering audiences.

"My brother begged me to come. I'm sorry I dragged you along with me."

"That's fine. I'm looking forward to it too"

If no one had invited him, Hira probably wouldn't have had an opportunity to see any stage play. Moreover, the arrangement after the stage play was more important to Hira than the stage play itself. The stage play would end in the evening, and afterwards they had agreed to eat dinner at Koyama's place. The arrangement was no different from usual, but today was a special day.

"Is it okay to have dinner at your house today?" While riding the train on the way there, Hira asked Koyama again. "It's rare for you to celebrate your birthday, so let me treat you to dinner if you want us to go out to dine."

"No, it's more relaxing to eat at home." Leaning against the tram door, Koyama smiled. Hira had no choice but to give up.

Today was Koyama's birthday. Hira was unaware of it when Koyama invited him to the stage play, but only after he heard the club members talking about it did he realize that it was Koyama's birthday. When Hira questioned why he hadn't told him, Koyama smiled shyly and answered, "Haha, I don't know why; I just didn't want to say it." At that time, Hira felt that he had to make up his mind.

Even though he and Koyama continued to be good friends, Hira was aware that Koyama's feelings for him were not those of friendship. Koyama definitely never tried to impose his feelings on Hira; rather, he chose to remain next to him while giving off a faint hint of liking.

If he were someone who was truly impossible to deal with, Hira would have no hesitation, but he felt troubled by the fact that this wasn't the case. He got along well with Koyama. And gradually he started to realize that, in the face of Koyama's sincere feelings, Hira ought to respond to him appropriately.

As if he were being pushed from behind, a few days ago Hira went to buy a birthday gift for Koyama. It was the first time for him to give someone a present, and after much hesitation, he chose a camera strap. This camera strap was made of good-quality nubuck leather; the longer you used it, the more it would show its merits, so much so that Hira wanted to buy one for himself as well.

After dinner, Hira was thinking of giving Koyama the present and confessing to him that he would go out with him. He experienced the sensation of being placed on a conveyor belt* at a factory. There was nothing that needed to be done, and the product would gradually be transformed into a state that would be ready for shipping. Hira wondered what kind of facial expression he would make while confessing to Koyama. It could probably be a terribly funny expression, or it could be a surprisingly normal one. Either way, Hira found it strange because he felt as though it was something that had nothing to do with him.

(T/N: *Conveyor belts: a continuous moving strip or surface that is used for transporting objects from one place to another. Image: