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CHAPTER FIVE ||| DEEP DOWN

"i got a call last night for a big gig. i'm meeting A few guys just outside chicago tonight. they told me to pack a bag for a few days" ash explained to her team as she leant against her desk. The teams eyes trained on her as they all listened closely, Taking in the risks and ensuring they were fully prepared for what Laid ahead. Yet the look on Jays Face didn't go unnoticed, Not to Ash.

"hell no, we can't keep track of you for days" Jay argued, His brows Closely knitted together as his eyes darted toward voight, The man who was supposed to look out for his team, Yet as Jay waited for the sergeant to agree, he was met with
silence.

No one said a word, the Team remained Focused on Ash's words, Waiting for the woman to fully confirm she was comfortable with the task at Hand.

"i can do it. set up a few wires in my clothes, car, phone. shit like that it'll be fine. i got this" ash said confidently, She didn't have a single doubt in her mind. She'd do what she had to do. There was no chance she was bailing, Not on her team, Not on her family, Not on the Girls who needed help.

In Her mind there wasn't a single reason she couldn't do it. In her mind, She didn't need help. She didn't want help. And a little added adrenaline never hurt. Adrenaline was Almost a drug.

Adrenaline was a certain drug That Ashley had almost become dependent on, She wasn't sure she'd ever be able to live without the thrill of being a street racer... Being a cop.

"ash, you sure?" antonio questioned, Wanting to unsure Ash's confidence was known. If she was confident, So was everyone else. and that was needed. she couldn't have them second guessing her.

"i'm sure" she confirmed. Her eyes glued to Antonio's. Neither of their Glances shifted, Yet Ash could Feel Jays eyes on her, She could feel his worry from Across the Bullpen.

***

"look ash before you go, i just wanted to apologise again. i don't want anything to happen to you okay?" jay took ash's hand in his as they were suiting up in a garage, The way he took Ash's hand without hesitation made her glance around the room to quickly Ensure no one was paying too much attention.

"i'll be alright jay. i promise" Ash reassured gently squeezing Jay's Hand, The look in his eye resembled the same concern she'd seen before. The same look remained deep within his eyes every time she was in danger.

"you need anything. you even just feel a little bit uncomfortable say your safe word and i'll be there" Jay nodded, Vowing not only to Ashley but to Himself that he wouldn't let her Get hurt. He couldn't even stomach the Idea.

As The Pair looked at Each other Ashley Nodded, Yet Jay's heart Ached With the fear of being unable to protect the people he cared about, Being unable to protect Ash.

"ash i love you" Looking up at Jay her throat dried up, aiding her inability to speak as she processed the words that had left the Lips of none other than Jay Halstead.

As if her heart stopped, Ash remained silent. Trying to piece together her thoughts and form the right words. And just as she went to speak the roar of a booming exhaust filled her ears, pulling her from the tense conversation.

"i have to go but we'll talk later alright?" Nausea spiralled through her stomach as she watched the man's expression drop as he nodded. Ash's chest constricted with anxiety as she walked away from him, Internally thanking the gods for saving her from the conversation.

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