the ruined girl

| chapter 19 |

we had arrived at the airport, and by my side was Gavi, Serena and Asensio. we were all walking together.

pedri was no where to be seen close to me, he kept his distance and that was seen. because even Asensio asked me what's up

we walked through security and made our way to the private plane

the Spanish Team said that me and Serena could take the private  plane with them instead of waiting for our plane to come, so that's what we did

me and Serena sat next to eachother, but Pedri went further as possible away from me and sat next to someone else

i wanted to use this time to speak to him but it just seems that he doesn't want anything to do with me at the moment

although i could literally be carrying his baby right now.

that's all i thought about. all i thought about was seeing a pregnancy test be positive. i was sick ever since yesterday. i was puking none stop and craving the weirdest stuff ever

i couldn't possibly imagine being a mom. and i couldn't imagine being a mom with Pedri as the father. it wouldn't work.

within two minutes of the flight i passed out asleep onto serena's lap. she stroked my hair as i felt tears falling down my eyes.

i just wanted to breakdown again

one because of pedri
and two because i could possibly be pregnant

i was praying

praying that I wasn't pregnant

i wouldn't want this baby to be living without it's father. it doesn't seem like the right thing to do.

i always felt at home with Pedri, and ever since he had been ignoring me I felt that sting my heart

i just wanted to be loved again, i wanted to have that comfort that would always be there for me

different thoughts rushed through my head
was pedri ready for a relationship?
was he cheating?
was he scared?
did he lose interest
or did I do something wrong?

these were all of the thoughts rushing through my brain.

i couldn't handle it anymore. the minute i get off this plane i am talking to Pedri. I couldn't deal with not figuring out what happened. why wasn't this right to be together? he said he would fight
he said he would do anything because he liked me that much. it was impossible that was the  reason why he stopped talking. it was not possible.

____

we landed and we made our way out to the cars. Gavi was going to get a lift with Asensio but his car was full. Serena was getting a lift with her family but I had no one to collect me. I text my parents, which was stupid seeing as I already knew the answer was "we are unable to"

so the only person I could go to was Pedri

he was facing away from me so i tapped his shoulder

"can you give me a lift home please" i said politely
embarrassed i had to ask him
he was the last person i wanted to speak to but also the first

"ummmm yea sure" he said with the voice i could tell he really didn't want to give me a drive home.

i sat in the passenger seat, it was only me and him in there.

i felt my stomach hurting.
hurting really bad

______

"Alena i need to tell you the truth, and this is a good opportunity"

i already knew what was going to happen

i looked at him worried as to what he was going to say
was this going to be good or bad? i didn't possibly know

"that girl you saw on the balcony, i lied. I'm sorry Alena but something happened between us" he said with his voice cracking in between

i felt a gap in my heart and i just wanted to cry

"so you cheated? that's why you ignored me and broke up with me? because of her"

"half of that is right but-"

"Can you stop the car Pedri" i asked insisting he opens the car.

"No Alena your not getting out in the middle of nowhere i'm driving you home" he said

"trust me Pedri id much rather walk home then be in a f!cking car with you so open it" i said as i shouted half of that sentence in anger.

my worst fear came through. Joao part 2 was happening and I could feel it

"Stay in the car alena im driving you home" he shouted.

I stayed in the car and stayed silent

"i didn't mean to yell im sorry Alena" he said  apologizing

i shook my head and looked out the window. tears dripping down as I wiped them in silence. I didn't want to say another word to him now. I just wanted to be at home