This is it

Chapter 2

Aloy crouched down in the tall grass, watching a herd of Chargers graze lazily nearby. She was tired. She'd been travelling all day, her mind racing from the Kulrut that morning. Sending Regalla and her rebels on their way, triumphing and prevailing, sure, all that felt great! But deep down something else was going on, she couldn't put a finger on. Maybe she just needed sleep. Yeah, that must be it she decided and slowly crawled to leave the herd behind and find a place to rest.

The sun was setting now, the golden light casting long shadows. Not that there was a lot of vegetation to actually cast said shadows but even the smallest rock, created stretched-out distorted shapes.

There, not far in the distance, the safety of a signal fire and shelter brought relieve to her frail mood. She warmed her hands on the fire as soon as she reached the small cliff top, a cavity in the rock wall. She knew, that behind the covered shed which usually provided travelers shelter from the weather, a place to rest and move on quickly, there was a hidden entrance to a cave, guarded by flowering shrubs. Machines couldn't detect humans inside these protected select caves, as the scent of the flowers deterred them and thus acting as a shield.

She liked this shelter; it was off the path of machine routes, and she could overlook the rocky landscape below and see sandy dunes and the glittering ruins of Las Vegas in the far distance, though it seemed much closer. Trick of vision, she had learned the hard way. Between here and Vegas lay miles and miles of vast desert with deadly machines of all shapes and sizes roaming the scarcely inhabited terrain. She sighed, her mood becoming quite foul. She was hungry, too.

Inside the cave Aloy found several straw beds, blankets, and a few trunks, which always held supplies and food. Such caves were certainly a blessing to travelers. The unspoken rule was, take something - leave something. She still had plenty of food, so she'd leave some before she would press on come morning. But for now, she was glad to be free of her weapons, shake out her clothes of dust and dirt from the road, take off her boots.

It was blissfully quiet in here. No chirping of crickets, no sounds of machines, close by or far away, no cries of battle, no noise. She was grateful for that. Her mind was loud though, so she tried to distract herself, knelt, arranged the straw bedding, unrolled her blanket and pillow, which she never travelled without, but went to grab another blanket. For some reason she was shivering. Then she meticulously cleaned and prepared her weapons to be ready to fight - just in case.

The sun had set when Aloy emerged from the cave, spear in hand, again, just in case. She set it down by her feet, the fire warming her back, and watched the stars become brighter. She'd brought out a blanket as well, covering her front. She contemplated the inexplicable butterflies in her stomach, while nibbling on a piece of Utaru fruit and nut cake.

Suddenly it dawned on her how quickly she had reached the shelter today. She'd taken the trek before, and it had taken her a good couple of hours longer. She supposed she couldn't wait to get back to their Base, deep in the snowy mountains west of Plainsong.

Of course, she was glad to see her friends again, most of all Varl and Erend, but she had become close to Zo as well. Now Kotallo would be joining her. That thought caused a jolt of adrenalin to hit her hard in the chest taking her breath away. She gasped. Fuck...

Now memories and visions flooded her mind, images of tightly pulled-back black hair, blue beads, white war paint covering his tight lips. Warm eyes, that could be cold, fierce, and relentless. Another adrenalin hit. This one pulsing in waves. "Shit!" She buried her face in her hands, sighed once more, then pulled her knees up to her chin and let it rest there, wrapping her arms around her legs.

Sitting like this in a tight bundle, she cursed herself for her weakness, for her feelings. This was not who she was. Or was it? Damn... it had been a while since... An image formed... of Nil beside her, naked, one arm behind his head, the other around her shoulders, her head contently on his chest, as they had lain watching the fire. There had been many such meetings with Nil. Back then she'd also thought the evil Helis far too attractive, giving her uncomfortably restless dreams, she's scolded herself for.

No, she certainly wasn't a wallflower. But this now, this was... it felt different. She'd first felt it on their inital mission together, when she knelt beside Kotallo as they watched a group of rebels they had just happened across. Deep in Sky Clan territory and alpine as the Sheerside Mountains were, it had been blistering cold, her whole body shaking with frost, barely able to nock her bow properly. He'd been so close to her, she had felt his heat radiating. He had given her instructions from what angle to attack, and she'd turned to nod her approval, instead had met his gaze, which had then dropped to her mouth, and she had licked her lips, but caught herself just in time, turned, embarrassed, flustered and confused, frustrated. Their ambush had been quick and successful, and after, when it was all over, he'd praised and encouraged her. She smiled at that memory. That one moment though had never happened again, nor had it been mentioned. She'd kept a safe distance from then on. Though she'd caught herself stealing glances at his profile, his physique, how his muscles moved effortlessly along his back and shoulders when he'd trained and done one-armed pull-ups. She'd turned away quickly, so he wouldn't see her staring.

Now, here on the cliff top, not really seeing or taking in the spectacular view at all, while the fire was warming her back, she suddenly felt fear creep up her spine, like icy, spindly fingers reaching for her core.

Pulling the blanket around her, she picked up her spear and moved inside. Her stomach in painful frosty knots, her mind on their near kiss, she buried herself in the blankets and attempted sleep, which came late and then was riddled with images of a partially shaved head, amber eyes, growing darker as his desire rose, lips that came closer, his soft breath on her lips... and just before they touched, she woke with a start.

Groggily she sat up, the faintest moon light breaking through the foliage at the front of the cave. Groaning she laid back down, touched her lips with her fingertips. She swore she had felt him. "God dammit!" she cursed.

Deciding sleep wasn't about to welcome her again into its warm folds, she threw back the covers, deeply drank cool water from her leather covered flask and got ready. Sadly, her stomach hadn't settled, so she huffed and puffed while she got dressed, made up the straw bed and replaced the blanket. She rummaged around her food pouch, found some salted mutton and Utaru bread wrapped in huge leaves to keep it from drying out, placed it in the wooden box and closed the lid securely. Into the other box she put some traps, she rarely used, glad to be rid of the excess weight.

She stepped outside, brushed her teeth with a linen cloth, which she kept for that purpose, then washed it out, while she chewed on a few mint leaves. She wrapped the remaining mint leaves in the moist cloth, pushed it all into a small pouch, spit out the other leaves and started to gear up.

The sun hadn't risen yet when she set out. Going east always felt good. She missed the Sacred Lands. Home... It had been much too long. But it would have to wait. Maybe she'd show Kotallo one day.

What?? she scolded herself at once. What was she thinking? Why was she thinking this? Who was she turning into? "Shit!" she shouted, thrust her spear out in a mock attack and immediately heard a rustling of grass not far from her position, just as the sun peaked bright over the mountains, blinding her momentarily. She heard a shriek, ducked just in time, and caught the red-eyed watcher in the underbelly and finished him off with a powerful lunge and successful strike of the spear, sending metal components flying.

"Ha!" she announced happily. "I'll put that in my stash," she smiled as the gathered different machine parts and feeling her mood lifting, she moved on, careful to also collect her thoughts, refocus on the journey and the way ahead.