the wrong side of loneliness | completed

3

Selma woke up to the sun shining on her face. It was shining through the open blinds, making her face feel warm. 

This was a good sign. 

She rolled over and let out a yawn. Without looking at the clock, she knew it was 8 in the morning. Her body clock was programmed to wake up at that specific time every morning.  

She pushed her comforter off her and turned to grab her phone. A few drunk-like texts from Minny, a picture of baby Emma from her sister, and none from Ty.

She opened Tinder and sent Ty a casual good morning text. Not too clingy or lovey-dovey He was offline. He was still sleeping, probably. And who woke up and decided to go on Tinder first thing in the morning, anyways? Was she addicted already? Selma decided she sounded insane and wouldn't check the app for another two hours. 

She stood up and made her bed, thinking about what to make for breakfast. She moved to the kitchen after deciding to make eggs and toast. While cooking, Selma checked her emails and texted the family group chat about the plans for next weekend. They were planning on going sightseeing in San Francisco. Or Hollywood. Selma agreed on Hollywood. She had always wanted to experience  going on a big tour bus and seeing celebrities' houses. 

Suddenly, her phone rang. 

Minny's picture lit up the screen. 

Selma answered and said, "You won't guess what happened last night." 

Minny shrieked. "Sex?"

Selma sighed.

"I'm sorry I said that. What happened?" 

"I downloaded the dating app." Selma took a deep breath. "And I am going on a date today!" She laughed with excitement and nearly jumped up and down. This could potentially be the best day of her life and the beginning of a new life. She already knew that Minny would be as excited as her. 

Instead, Minny was unusually silent. 

"Um, are you there? I said I have a date! His name's Ty. He's so funny and I think that he really likes me. I used that picture you took of me in that restaurant. So I want to extend a thank you because that picture really saved my ass." Selma giggled. 

"Selma..." Minny's usual bubbly voice was flat and quiet. "Don't you think you're rushing it? Like, rushing it to the point where it's kind of scary?" 

"No. I already think we have a really good connection. Why are you..." Selma brought her thumbnail up to her mouth and then pulled it away. Bad habit. "Why are you being negative? This is a big moment." 

"This is just worrying me. You just met this guy. Have you even called him on the phone?" 

Selma's heart started to race. "No, I haven't." 

"Where are you going on a date? Did you tell him a coffee shop? At least?"

Selma chewed on her thumbnail. She was starting to get pissed. "I gave him my address so he could pick me up. I'm telling you, we talked all night. I felt a connection right away. When you know, you just KNOW." 

Minny groaned. "Selma, how could you be so dumb? Honestly?" 

Anger and shock boiled in Selma's chest. "Why can't you be happy for me? You're my best friend. You went on a date with someone from a dating app. Why can't I? Do you just think I'm uncapable of doing things?"

"You know what, you're right. I'm not happy for you. Because you just told me something that contained about a thousand red flags. I wouldn't go on that date if I were you. I love you, but this is really scary. But you probably already know that. Call me when you're done being a lunatic." 

The line went dead. 

Selma wanted to throw her phone and stomp on it. Minny was right. 

But you only lived once. It would be fine. 

Selma checked the app. He hadn't texted her back yet. 

She took a deep breath, put her phone down and went to get ready.

-

The clock read 10:15.

Still no text. Selma was starting to get frustrated. 

Maybe it was time for a double text. 

Hey, are we still on for today?

She set her phone down and looked at herself in the mirror. Light, glowy makeup and a cute pink sweater with jeans. There was a small bleach stain on the left pant leg. He wouldn't notice. Silver necklace and tiny pearl earrings. Now it was time to decide what purse to take. The black one with the obnoxious gold strap or the cream one with the cute clasp?

BANG.

BANG.

BANG. 

Selma jumped, every single hair on her body standing up. 

The noises were coming from her front door. 

BANG. 

The door shook. 

Selma took a step back, stumbling over the purses she had dropped. 

What the hell? Who knocked that loud? It wasn't even polite knocking. It was just hitting the door. Or kicking it.

With silent footsteps, she slowly made her way to the front door. She was holding her breath, a hand on her stomach. Why was she so paranoid? 

Looking through the peephole, Selma watched the man standing in front her door. She didn't recognize him. 

He had gray hair that was thinning around the top of his head. He was wearing a flannel and jeans with big, gaping holes in them. He held a baseball hat in his hands. 

Maybe it was the maintenance man. But she knew it wasn't. Maybe he was new. Her toilet had been making a weird noise lately and she had called the front office a few days ago. Had they sent someone to fix it?

She looked back at the peephole.

He was looking around with bright interest. The door shook again. He was hitting it, straight on with his fist. Selma took a shaky breath and put her hand over her mouth. She had to be quiet. She leaned against the wall, feeling sick to her stomach.

She had to do something.

With silent and quick footsteps, Selma hurried to the kitchen to grab a knife. She tiptoed back to the door, a nice sharp cutting knife clutched in her hand. Loudly, she said, "Sorry, but I don't know who you are. You have the wrong apartment." Her heart was beating so fast that she thought it might burst from her ribcage.

She tried to remember what her dad taught her. Aim for the eyes...

The man looked directly into the peephole. "We had a date, didn't we?" He looked away, a confused look on his face.

All the blood drained from Selma's face. 

This couldn't be happening.

No.