𝙵𝚛𝚘𝚜𝚝𝚔𝚒𝚜𝚜

𝙽𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚂𝚑𝚒𝚏𝚝

𝙽𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 : 1
1 𝚖𝚘𝚗𝚝𝚑 𝚋𝚎𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚌𝚒𝚍𝚎𝚗𝚝

00:00 𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚏𝚝 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚜

I drove as fast as possible to the shop since I was ran late
and the reason of this delay was that I felt like I forgot something important to bring, but I couldn't find it so I just sprinted

I am not willing to get scolded again by the owner, and yet it happened when I arrived fifteen minutes late, I apologized and promised not to be late again

as always..

but it's just not fair though, I'm doing my best to drive two miles every night to this place and yet I don't get the praise for it?

"Whatever"

is what I told myself after he departed, and is what I've been told to tell myself by the psychiatrist

To let go of what might put me on the cliff of paranoia

it's finally silent, his screams at me faded out of my head after I started hearing the cat clock ticking and the humming fluorescent sound of the electric retro fridge next to the coffee machine, those sounds started to feel like something I need to hear in the start of each day

like music to my ears
like keeping on a strict regimen of a drug

Today's shift was busy

many people came to have something for the road

old and young, mean and nice

I got used to it

the ones who judge my suicide attempts scars on my neck and wrists with a look or a pitiful word just happen to appear translucent to me

and I just sigh with a grin of hope that everything's gonna go well

and it does..

Not gonna lie, despite the social anxiety I suffer from, I really feel a bit reassured whenever a family sticks around for a while

but I feel the absolute horror when someone alone stays to have their order in the café

sitting there in front of me, my anxiety then kicks in like a rampage

It went well, fortunately as usual.

...