My hearts pumping out of my chest and my brains screaming, but they can't know.
I sit at the toilet with my head leaning into the bowl, it doesn't happen much but when I'm feeling really bad sometimes cutting myself isn't enough.
My throats stinging, tears keep steaming down my cheeks.
What happened to me?
It started when I was 16, the cutting, the depression and me feeling like nothing even mattered anymore.
At that point it didn't. Every single night I cried, every single day I would cut and day by day they got longer and then the cuts became deeper. One time it was too deep.
Mum didn't know, I always felt like dad secretly knew, but he never said anything.
I felt so crap about myself, my head would tell me that I'm not meant for this world, I was a mistake and I should just die.
That's when I wanted to kill myself, the cut- it was the deepest I'd gone but now I don't regret it.
~
I feel so hungry but I can't eat, I haven't for days and I can't start now.
As I was putting on my school shoes I felt the urge to run to the draw and pull out my blade, I couldn't resist.
I slid it across my wrist. Numbness, it's all I could feel. Bandaging it, I pulled over my jumper and got into the car.
YOU ARE READING
Hidden Under Rocks
Fiksi RemajaAbigail Kaduna only has one reason that's been keeping her alive. As for secrets, she has many, starting from her secret binges to her non-existing love life. Until one day she passes by the much loved Adam, he's the type of guy that girls dream abo...
