The Crocus Lawn// Levi x reader BOOK 1

II

Nanaba showed you the ropes, she had been at the base for a few days before you arrived. She bragged that she was the first of the new age group to turn up, her brother was in the Training Corps, he'd told her.
"And he's gonna be an MP or something, I just know it!" Nanaba continued to brag at the dinner table.
You and Rico chuckled, it was a weird group you had.
You tried to remember your brother. You knew you had one, or at least someone you had called a brother. You didn't remember his name though, and you were never entirely sure if you even had the same mother, never mind father.
"Hey Spud, missing the kitchen?" Rico chuckled, shaking you out of your daydream.
"Oh, no! I mean, I do miss having good food, I wish Sean or Ronnie would transfer here," you rambled, "and I miss seeing the Scouts, some of them were real nice."
Nanaba looks at you and nods.
"My brother was friends with folks in the years above, some of them went Scouts," she said, "apparently as part of Corps training some will be coming back for the lectures."
You smiled, putting down your gruel-like soup. That was something to look forward to at least.

———
"Rats! The lot of you!" A scary looking man boomed as the cadets stood to attention before him.
You shuffled nervously, you didn't like loud authority figures.
"You, Kitchen Rat! I remember you serving me up the worst slice of toast I've ever witnessed when I was last at the Survey Corps. Let's hope the Titans find you just as unpleasant to eat as that mangled piece of bread!"
He was talking to you, walking closer, berating you with each step. You shuddered, looking at the trampled dirt beneath your feet. You remembered that slice of bread, Meave had told you it was fine to serve. She was leaving the kitchen to have a baby, she probably didn't care if she was reprimanded. That was a mouthful though, how could you get out of it?
"Just following orders, Sir!" You replied, with as much courage as you could muster.

He stopped right in front of you, glaring into your soul, willing you to crumbled. You didn't.

"I see, and if your captain orders you to jump off the walls..?" He said, his voice seemed calmer this time.
No, it was a trick, what's the answer?

"Gear up and jump, Sir,"

He hums in acknowledgement, but there's more. He's testing you, and you know it.

"There's no gear, you've been told to jump,"

"Is my captain next to me?" You dare to ask, looking up.

His jaw tightens, you could still pass this.

"Yes, cadet."

You look away, only for a moment. You clench your jaw, and turn back to him, eyes burning.

"I will not throw my life away, but I will not fight if they choose to push me off," you growl.

Shadis nods, maybe it wasn't the answer he expected, but it was enough. Besides, it told him three valuable things about you: you'll follow orders, you have the sense to think of a logical solution, and when push comes to shove; you'll preserve your own life as long as necessary. He carried on walking, tormenting more new cadets, and you felt your shoulders finally relax. You also felt a hand reassuringly pat yours. It could've been Nanaba or Rico, both were stood behind you, but you dared not look to check.

"Alright maggots, you're all getting your first Titan lecture today. You'll be given instructions on where to proceed after that," Shadis yells, bringing his fist to his heart.

You all mirror his action, except one or two cadets who aren't quite sure what to do yet. They'll lean, you figure.
———
"Hello! My names Hange Zoe, I'll be teaching you a bit about the Titans!" A young Scout hollered from the front of the lecture hall, "Forgive me if this is too fast, too slow, not enough detail, etc, I only graduated a year or so ago."

They wave at some third years, 95th Corps? Your maths wasn't great and that made you anxious. Hopefully none needed to be done in Titan class.

"I wonder why there's some third years here?" Rico whispered, nudging you.

You shrugged, they were all probably friends with Hange if they had only graduated last year. Gosh you thought when did I get old enough to consider a year a short time?
Hange rambled on for a few hours, most of the cadets shifting between horror and boredom. Eventually, class was over. As you left your seat and ventured towards the door, a voice stopped you.

"Hey, wait!" It was Hange.

You turned to face them.

"I remember you from the kitchen! God I was nervous on my first day there, most of my friends were in the year below or other regiments," they chuckled, "but then I ate some of that potato soup, now was it potato soup? No, wait, I'm sure it was..."

You coughed, anxious to leave, who was this person?

"Anyway, matters not. Whatever it was, it was delicious, better than anything they do here. I don't know if you made it or only served it, but it made settling in a whole lot easier. I wanted to thank you."

You let out a sigh, you remembered that day. You had seen new recruits pile in after graduation a couple of times now. It was always the same. They all looked so nervous, like none of them knew each other. It made you feel glad to have Rico who wanted to join the Garrison, and Nanaba who wanted to join the Scouts. You thought you were going to join the Garrison at this point, but it didn't hurt to make friends in other regiments.

———

You spent most of your training days hanging out with Rico and Nanaba, the three of you had gotten quite close over the months. Hange often visited for lectures, and when the third years graduated they brought one back as an assistant. He was called Moblit, if you remembered correctly, and he seemed like he was good friends with Hange. Nanaba's brother had been in that year, he hadn't come back to visit with Hange, but Nanaba bragged that he was training for an important mission. Sometimes you and Rico each got a letter from Sean, more often it was a shared letter. Sometimes it was your name next to Rico's, other times it just said "Spud". Not that you were ungrateful that Sean was looking out for you, but you wondered if perhaps you should try and write to your brother.
The thought of your brother stayed in your head that night as you drifted off to sleep in the bunk below Rico...

It was dark, and cold. That much was clear. Blurry movements clouded your vision. Was that a knife in front of you? Maybe you should grab it...

"Fuck! It stabbed me!" You hear a disjointed voice call out.

Looking up, there's a boy. He looks a bit older than you, and he's clutching his hand. The hand it seems you had just stabbed.

"Isla?" The boy gasped "what are you doing!"

He didn't look particularly angry. Who was Isla?

You woke with a start, gasping for breath. Nanaba reached out her arm from her bunk next to you.
"Nightmare?"

"Something like that.." you began, not sure what to tell her.

"What about? You don't have them often."

"I think... I was Isla, I think that was my name before now" you whispered "I think I saw my brother."

Nanaba nodded, stroking your hand.
The boy was a couple of years older than you, that much you could tell. He didn't look much like you, or at least you didn't think so. His hair was blonde, and kind of scruffy. He wasn't around when you left to join the kitchen, you couldn't remember why.