Crossed paths - Jenlisa adaptation

XIX - Crossed Paths

Well shit. I messed up. Sana posted that picture on her twitter along with the first incriminating picture of me and Jennie because I pushed her. Shes wouldn't've posted it if I hadn't pushed her, she only would've shown Jennie. Bella told me this so I don't know how reliable she is as a source. The pictures had been reposted by almost everyone in our class, and I dreaded going to school the next day.

This was going to be a terrible day, one of those days when it's best to stay in bed because everything is going to turn out bad. I rolled over in my bed to face the wall. I didn't want to look at my phone because I knew that Rosé had probably left me more than enough messages about yesterday but I didn't want to talk about it. I didn't even want to think about it. It was a mistake Nobody was supposed to see it: it shouldn't have even happened.

I punched my wall and some paint crumbled off. I couldn't believe that Sana would go to such measures to humiliate me in front of the whole school and the one person I cared about most. I stuffed my face in my dillow and screamed as loudly as I could. After I got myself together, I went downstairs where my mom was, as usual, fixing up my breakfast. "Mom, I really don't want to go to school today.

"Why not?" She turned around to look at me, "you look perfectly healthy."

"Well, mom, mental health is also valid, so just occause 1 look okay, doesn't mean i am okay.

"Lisa honey, I would believe you but we have this exact conversation every morning so go back to your room. get changed and then we can talk."

#'But mom-* "Lisa, I don't want to hear it. Now go."

"But this isn't any other day-"

"Lisa just go to your room. I'm not in the mood," Mom raised her voice and glared at me. 1 groaned, throwing my head back in aggravation and stomped up to my room ostentatiously, out I didn't slam the door because that would be too risky with my mother. I threw on a pair of dark grey yoga pants and a casual beige hoodie.

1 dragged myself downstairs and put on white adidas trainers, sitting on the bottom step. when I sat down the table, Mom looked at me.

She was shocked to see me in casual clothes since had recently been dressing up to low-key impress Jennie.

Especially since I found out she had the gay. "wow, you really aren't okay," my mom gasped as she put my breakfast on the table in front of me.

"Well I did say, but you ignored me,"

"Stop pouting, tell me what's wrong with you."

'It'S fine mom, it won't change a thing. I'm already dressed and I won't let it be in vain."

"Are you sure you don't want to talk about itzu

"No, mom I'm fine. Seriously," I sighed and finished my breakfast with only the sound of chopsticks clattering against the bowl filling the silence. I suddenly stood up, giving my mom a jump scare and told her | was going to brush my teeth. As I was brushing. I decided I was going to avoid Jennie today and tomorrow and forever. After I was I done, I quickly packed my bag, brushed my hair and shoved it into a ponytail. l cut on my winter coat and kissed my mom on the check sefore | left the housc.

Rosé was waiting for me outside looking like an Inuit Cute Little penguin. "You took your time, she whined. shrugged and we started walking. I was angry. Angry at myself, angry at Jennie, angry at Sana, angry at Tzuyu, angry at everyone. Before we walked into school, I put my hood on and held my head low. It was useless though because everyone stared at me anyway and I was just making myself look stupid. "Lisa, it's okay-*

"Is it? Is it really?" | snapped at her and we stopped walking, "it's not okay. Everyone thinks I Like freshmen and everyone knows that I'm gay. Nobody likes me anymore and they might even stop liking you because of it. So, no. It's not really okay," | looked at her again before I walked to homeroom. When I walked in, I got stares but that may have been because everyone looks at the person that walks into a room. Either way, I didn't think like that at the time and I wanted to crawl into the hole I dug out myself. I quickly sank into my seat and slouched over the table playing a game on my phone.

At lunch, I bought myself a sandwich and a small bottle of water. I sat down at my usual table with my soccer squad but quickly one by one they all left me. "Rosé, aren't you gonna come?" Eleanor asked as she got up with her almost full tray. It was more of a command in disguise as a question. Rosé look at me with guilt and hesitantly left me too. I clenched my jaw and my fists and glared as they walked away to join the rest of the girls who left shortly before them.

I couldn't focus on any food and just stared at my friends', And to think that Are once sald to me that she woutdn't care if I was gay. I scoffed at the memory and took an aggressive bite off my sandwich. At least when Jennie was ditched, she had me. l have no one. Just me. Lonely me. Gay and lonely me I wanted to scream at them. I wanted to beat them all up to death. They made me so fuCKINg angry! Ohh, and Sana? Don't even. Don't even. I wanted to ounch her pretty little Columbian face and make it bleed more than your finger bleeds when you get a paper cut. late my sandwich and went to the restroom. I stared at the floor as I felt the stares in the hallway. I hurried past everyone and I suddenly bumped into someone, knocking her off her feet.

It was Jenniel Holy fuck! "oh god I'm sorry!" | held out my hand but she didn't take it. She stood up on her own and looked at my lips and then my eyes. She didn't say anything and continued walking to her destination. I stood dumbfounded and I wanted to call after her but when I turned around, an ocean of seniors was glaring at me. If I'm honest, it was only seniors that avoided me. Freshmen seemed to like me more after the

'scandal'

a

Twent to the restroom and cried in a cubicle. I held my hand over my mouth so that I wouldn't be very loud. felt so disgusting and sad and my hands were cractically dripping with nose juice and saliva. I wiped my hand and my mouth and stared at the door thinking I was done crying out I really wanted Jennie to hug me and comfort me and kiss me. But she hated me. I started crying again. It was an uneven pattern of Sobbing and sighing and I wanted to drown in the toilet.

a

I got my chone out and called my mom. "Mom," I sobbed.

"'Lisa? Are you okay? What happened?"

"Mom can you come and pick me up. l wanna go home,*

I barety finished because I started crying again.

*Or coursel Baby stay strong. Il be right there!'"Okay. Thank you," I hung up and started crying again.

After a couple of minutes, I fixed myself and left the cubicle. As if on cue, Jennie walked in. She looked at me. with anger at first but then she looked concerned,

"have you been crying?"

"why do you care?" | spat out coldly.

"Lisa. Is there any-"

"Jennie. I wish I never met you. We crossed paths, and I wish we never did. You brought a lot of joy into my life, but because of you, Sana brought me misery. It's not your fault, and it's not my fault either. But | hope that you realise that it's Sana's fault and not mine," I sighed, *I love you Jennie. I love you so much and I would never do anything to hurt you. When you told me you were gay, I thought I had a slight chance. But I don't. So it was great knowing you out l have done everything | could do. Have you?"

I looked at her and she stood there with her mouth slightly open, as if she wanted to say something. I scoffed when she didn't say anything and brushed past her when I walked out. I looked oehind me hoping that she would run after me but I really don't matter to her so l ust went to the office.