Broken Birds

Twelve

Aryan asked me out to lunch, I was hesitant but agreed anyway. I can't just keep playing along anymore.

"Why don't we order first" he says picking up the menu.
"I'm not hungry" I say annoyed.

He tilts his head looking at me amused but says nothing. "I feel like eating something fatty today"
I say nothing just scrolling through my camera roll.

"Is something wrong?"
I nod "Oh, you've noticed?"
He smiles "what is it?"

"What are we doing? No—what game are you playing?"
He shrugs "And by that you mean?"
"At first I thought maybe you just wanted to help but people aren't like that, you don't seem like that. What do you want from me?"

"Hmm" he says keeping the menu, looking like he's in deep thought "What do you think I'm after?"

I shake my head "That's what I'm trying to figure out"
"No no. You should have an idea what it is I'm after, don't you think?"

"How?" I ask raising my eyebrows annoyed.
He takes a deep breath almost like he was both frustrated and amused "Okay Anwar. If a girl approaches me, shows any interest in me—I believe there must be a reason someone shows interest in you so I don't blame you for thinking I'm after something but you should at least have an idea what people want from you. I could think someone approaches me for my money, looks, brain, fashion sense or whatever because you'd be surprise to hear people's preferences but you can't think of one reason why I'm doing this? Is the confidence you have in yourself that low?"

He takes a deep breath "So you think I'm playing you, you can't think of any reason why. Do you perhaps like me?"

I chuckle "I'm engaged"
"That's isn't an answer"

"No, I do not like you"
He frowns, he looked saddened and dismayed "I know what I'm about to say does not matter to you but I'm disappointed"

I fold my arms.
Yeah, it really doesn't matter to me.
"When we met—the image I had of you was different but realizing you weren't who I thought you were at least—you've let others change you and I didn't want to sit back and watch you live like that. And whether I want to admit it or not I still feel attracted to you so it's heartbreaking to hear you say you cannot think of any reason why a guy would approach you. That's why whether you think I'm a player or not we're doing this"

"I'd be using you"
"I don't mind, use me but living the way you are now—it's no way for a woman to live" he smiles "I escaped from the office, I should get back. Excuse me" he walks away.

I didn't know what to say or do.
Oh God!

::

Aryan's POV.

Why do people criticize other people who marry for money, fame, looks or whatever.
I won't because for me what matters most in a partner is how they make me feel despite all their flaws.

I don't find anything wrong with a girl marrying a man for his money, she loves money and she wants a life of luxury, there's nothing wrong with that. Technically speaking, it's the same as a man marrying a woman for her looks and body. We all have want we want in a partner and whether it's brains, wealth, love, protection, power it doesn't matter, it's a preference and it's not something you can control, why should you anyway? Because people think it has to be love?

That's why people are so unhappy in this generation. If you like a girl for her looks tell her because whether you want to admit it or not I am very sure they're other things about her that you like as well, it's just that the looks got your attention.

The more I spend time with Anwar the more I realize she isn't who I thought. Some people might be insulting me right now saying that I shouldn't have judged a book by it's cover, that I fell for her cover up bright personality.

But the bright personality isn't what piqued my interest. It was the level of confidence she had. I've met a lot of girls who come from wealthy families and their so confident, most times overconfident.

But hers felt different.
Like she was proud of herself and where she came from. So honestly, for me it was disheartening hearing her talk smack about herself and how she behaves like she's a plague, even to herself.

At the moment I'm not sure if I'm actually still willing to take any other step apart from friendship but I do want to help her and unless she pushes me away I'm not leaving her side until I do.

Kiki, Azza, Aziza and I are going to the hospital and before you say anything—No, she and I aren't in a relationship.

I was taking Azza to the hospital and of course you know Aziza has to tag along but I needed a flash drive from my office so I decided to stop by. I offered her a ride when I saw her leaving.

While they waited I went to the pharmacy and got her medication and injection.
"Here you go. So let's get you injected" I say handing the bag to her twin sister.

She pouts.
"What is it?"
She looks at me about to tear up.
"Don't tell me injections still frighten you?" I ask in disbelief.

"But you need it. Don't worry, we won't laugh"
Aziza stands "I'll take her myself"
I nod "Sure. Kiki and I will wait for you at the reception. Call if you need me"

They both nod and walk away.
I went and joined Kiki.
"They said they'd handle it themselves?" She asks with a smile.
I nod.

She smiles "I wish I had a twin"
"You wouldn't want to share the attention"
"True. True".

I huff staring idly at the floor.
Wondering if giving up on Anwar is what I actually want.

"What is it?"
"Huh?" I ask turning to look at her.

"What are you thinking about?"
"Okay. I want your take on something, as a female of course"

She nods "I'm listening" she says giving me her undivided attention.
"There's this girl I bumped into a few months back and I fell head over heels. I think it was her confidence that really got me whipped and I just couldn't get her out of my mind. We met a few times and got to know each other and I realized that she's completely different from who I actually thought she was, she has zero confidence but I was willing to do anything to make her someone she can be proud of but it pains me each time we have a conversation and it's like she hasn't changed"

"How so?"
"Uhh—she asked if I have a reason for helping her and I told her it's because I like her but she still asks and behaves like she's not worth my time or anyone's time at all and it pains me. She keeps saying that liking her couldn't possibly be my only motive. Seeing someone you'll give the world to, treating themselves like they don't deserve even a pin is very hurtful. She might think I'm out of her league but I don't, to me she's way way way out of MY league".

She smiles "Women whether you're out of their league or not all want clarity. Let's be honest if a man wants to help me and tells me it's because he likes me knowing fully well I'm engaged, I'm going to be curious too. What about me do you like that much? And it sounds like she's been heartbroken a few times so it's only normal that she wouldn't completely trust you. Give her time, don't rush her and reassure her. Every woman wants reassurance"

I take a deep breath.
"Just give her a break. Be nice and be patient, okay?"

I nod "Okay, I will"
"Good" she smiles.

::