She could only watch as he lay in front of her in a black suit, thousands of people around him. He was candidly loved by millions of people, and he deserved that. Not him lying dead in front of her but all of the people that love him and his passion for music and the arts, and his compassion for humanity. He sidled into her heart but she shouldn't have let him. But she doesn't regret it. Even if it brings her sorrow for the rest of her years for not being able to listen to him again. The days she spent crying, laughing, dancing and singing with him will always be the best she ever had and will have. Nothing can ever make her lose the love for him. She walks back home, and for the first time it's not tears of sorrow but the tears of reminiscence.
Before falling in love is a time when love could blossom like a rose, beautifully when everyone admired it from afar, and without knowing it, getting close enough to touch it. Not looking beneath to the ugly horror of thorns that prickle out the sinful delight of trickling blood. But, when the time comes, all petals' future is to wither to their dry death and fall. And so, revealing those wretched thorns, and showing their true colors.
She laid down on the silky sheets of her pillows looking through the windows not minding the white curtains fluttering in the breeze. She sat and she wrote, she wrote what she was feeling, she wrote down her memories, she wrote in the way he told her she was good at, she wrote a poem.
He could forever savor her petals,
with their pacifying complexion filled with colors,
and hear her still, and hushed, and tranquil insight
as he listened to those colors.
He wasn't the one who had made her feel the least,
but instead, the one who had made her feel like she was on top of a cliff.
Whether that made her feel exuberant or agitated
Every day and every night and countless hours,
She wanted so badly to hide him away and preciously preserve him.
but she dared not to take him away from the other purple flowers,
Since he was neither hers nor theirs
But belonging in the hearts of those who candidly love him,
So he sidled into hers
deep enough to want to keep him away from the other flowers,
Yet she could not,
because it was there that he was needed and there she would let him be.
Standing above the ground,
where he belonged,
Where he is skies away
and where he is the moon during the day.
Always touching stars,
Caressing away scars
And giving people the kind of love and hope
That even happiness could not.
She turned her memories back to before, when she had loved an ordinary man and not an unreachable star. Licking the salty tears from her lips, she let a smile crack across them and remembered.
She had first seen him under an array of the warm and welcoming autumn colors of maple trees after midnight. The silver moonlight emphasized the petals of their newly found orange and turned them to a red instead. He was lying on the grass, what seemed like a canvas balanced by the tree behind him, and from that moment, she was entranced. The moonlight washed lightly over his face, the sleeping face of a breathtaking human. With the moons' graceful dance and the shadows that italicize his dark and gleaming hair. For a long time, she stood at the sidewalk, watching, admiring, imprinting every detail into her heart and soul so that in moments of the future, when things turned vile as everything did with time, like salt to the water, she could look back and recall the enchanting passion in this crimson red feeling of love and admiration.
She woke up the next morning, with puffy red eyes, and tear stained cheeks. These days, every time she walked past the ice cream trucks, parks, malls, lakes, and small business restaurants they've been to in the past, lost their bold and vivid colors and turn a dull ash gray. He wasn't just the light to her darkness, but also the color to her tasteless world.
And so, for the last time ever, she walked away from his grave thinking about the unjust the world has thrown at her. Just as the rose flower pricks, it also wilts and as her heart has wilted, she joined her one and only true love forever.
