Discontinued Fate

Laugh

Seokjin POV

'Oh- sorry-' I pretended to dash into him when his head whipped. Eyes wide, like a deer caught in a headlight, he went from pale to flush and then pale again. His smile is gone. The same one he had pulled for his students, for his ,colleagues and even for the newspaper vendor. Yes, I had been following him since dawn break. I must say he has developed quite an active routine, was this the same man that I had to drag out of bed for a day of schedule? I watched him arrive to work on a cycle, wrapped up in a trench coat, his long mane neatly tamed. Then he disappeared inside the compound. My seat in the cafe right opposite blessed me with some glimpses of him playing and dancing around with the children, laughing with them with a twinkle in his eyes. The same one that never failed to charm anyone, just any living human.  Not once, in the last ten hours did he notice me, even the cafe owner felt pity for me. But then it was nightfall and the day was ending with yet another separation from my Tae. I couldn't quit the rumbling need for him inside me, and jumped out of the car following him. He was across the road in a bookstore and I never intended to crash into him, so unelegant. But he just turned at the right moment and so here were, very startled. 

'Hi! Nice to see you again.' I pulled on my best smile, hiding the voices in my head.  

'Hieeee. You again.' he blinked and let the words hang in the air. He shifted uncomfortably and stepped back. His eyes questioned me suspiciously to check if I was a stalker or a creep. There was a swift exchange between him and the man following him closely like I could be a potential danger. 

'Hi! Gwangsan Kim!' I exclaimed trying to pace my breathing. But he seemed startled by the detail I remembered. 'The one who refused to have coffee with me.' I smiled even wider, hiding the cringe of my own words. Lips pursed in a forced smile, he read me again, I knew that look.

'What are you doing here?' he asked, shaking his head while peeling his eyes off me and landing them on the bookstore door.

'I- Books! I like to read them.' I blurted pointing to the door.  What the hell is wrong with me? But something was definitely very wrong when his eyes were not on me. 'What about you?! Do you read?' 

'I am a teacher. Books are part of my job.'  he admitted, still not looking at me. He shifted his weight to the toes and back to the heel. 

'Yeah, I heard it's a popular bookstore.' A lie. His lips drew in a familiar smirk, he knew it was a lie. 

'Yeah, ok. Bye.' he mumbled. One more look at me, this time full of despair before he turned away, not wanting to head into the bookstore anymore. Did he hate me that much? 

'Can-can we talk?' I call out a little loud that the lady leaving the bookstore thought I was speaking to her, in an unknown tongue. I shook my head at her and turned back to Taehyung, who was already ten steps ahead of me. 'Hey wait!' I ran after him. 

'I am actually running late.' he said out loud, still walking, still running away from me. I wanted to stop, this was ridiculous, but my feet were in an overdrive rushing after him, quickly closing in the distance. Now he could sense I was close, but he didn't want to stop. His face was a shroud of disdain towards me.

'Oh! I was just- hoping to get to know you better.' I confessed mumbling to myself as I slowed down. He didn't want me, then why I am here? I came to a stop, my world crashing around me as I focussed on the footpath. Familiar words rang in my head. 

'Aish!' he sighed and I didn't realize he had stopped a few steps away as well. 'Look, Mr. Kim, I don't think this will work out between us.' he sighed as I met his eyes, they were blank, and so was his face. The picture-perfect poker face.  

'Why?' I asked, just in time before he could retreat. 'Why not?' I asked, not intending to be this intense. He could sense the atmosphere growing darker and more difficult between us.