Law Of Proclivity

28.<FELIX>

"lee Felix "

"Felix..."

"Open the door come on now"

His efforts rendering useless led to seungmin picking the lock to Felix's apartment. He invited himself in, gradually trudging towards his friends bedroom.

There he was. Lee Felix.

Heartbroken. Eyes swollen red and watery. The lump in his throat bobbing up and down. He looked so miserable and guilty. He reminded seungmin of when he was young. A young boy miserable from his cruel life just thinking of ways to re-evaluate his life choices. Seungmins own breathing increased. He couldn't be so selfish and think about his own past when his friends present was like this.

He looked so vulnerable just hugging his knees in the floor. Arms on his knees making a make-shift sanctuary for him.

Seungmins took calculated steps towards Felix. Fearing he might petrify his friend that may cause him  to have a panic attack.

He cleared his throat gaining the silver heads attention.

Felix flinched at the foreign sound. His eyes darting sideways locating for the source. His cheeks puffed and eyes wide looking ready to ball his eyes out. Only when he saw the cause of the noise did he calm down a bit.

"You ok man?"

Seungmin was inches away from him. He didn't wait for Felix to reply instead he hugged his waist and pulled his head towards the youngers chest, patting his head softly.

The gesture so soft reminded him of Hyunjin. He was so perfect. So ethereal. So out of this world. If he could he'd bottle his memories with Hyunjin together and get drunk on them again and again and again and again. He'd replay those moments hoping he'd feel the ecstacy he felt at first. Every little thing reminded him of Hyunjin. He loved that fact. He could never hate anything associated with Hyunjin except himself.

If only he could detach himself from Hyunjin. Take away all their memories spent together just to spare the blonde from his fucked wrong doings.

His small hands clutching the fabric of seungmins shirt. So tightly it might've aswell ripped apart. His apartment welcomed his sobs. Loud, heartaching, irregular. His bottled up emotions went haywire. He couldn't control it anymore. He cried---no he screamed. He screamed because of his own insolence. He screamed because of his inability to cherish Hyunjin. He screamed for his life and Hyunjins. He screamed to express his hatered for Madeleine.

"Its ok... Its ok Felix!"
Seungmin cupped his cheeks. Staring into Felix's glossed up eyes and parted lips that kept screaming and crying. He shook his friend by the shoulder.

"Stop it seungmin I can't ---"

"You'll hurt your throat lix-"

"Shut up shut up shut up Shut up!!"

"Lix-"

"Its me. Its my fault. Im such a backstabber. Im-"

"You're ok. Its fine"

"No..no!"

Despite Felix's struggles to get away from seungmins grip he was unsuccessful. Seungmin held him  for dear life. Wondering if his friend would fall apart if he didn't held him together. On the other hand, Felix kept shaking his head to and fro. Nonsense and incoherent sentences spouting out of his mouth.

Seungmin tried petting his hair again. It seemed to work before. It will work again.  He was positive.

Seungmin wasn't sure what Felix did for him to react like that but he was ready to drop down on one knee , even kneel infront of Hyunjin to seek for his forgiveness for his friend. He couldn't stand seeing such a kind soul going through so much. He just couldn't. It was impossible.

Kind people were only meant to be rewarded with kindness. This was how it should've been. Felix was so lovely. He couldn't have done anything wrong.

He silently begged to any god that heard him to respond and heal his friend. He wasn't a religious person but for Felix he'd worship any god he found.

"Lix stop crying....please"

He was begging to someone anyone to help Felix.

Tears poured down seungmins eyes too. Fuck Felix.

Felix was with him when no one was back when they were kids. He would repay that. He didn't care if Felix saw that as a natural thing to do---to he his friend--- it wasn't. Even if he didn't saw it but seungmin  was indebted to him . That's one of the reasons he joined the detective agency. It was what Felix told him he wanted to be when he grew older. Felix changed paths but seungmin always admired Felix and thus he began to admire what was once Felix's dream and now seungmins reality.

He would fix everything for Felix.

"What happened lix?"

"I"

"I don't know"

"Please tell me. Tell me what do you want? Do you want me to kill someone? To eradicate the one causing this? Do you want me gone? Dammit just tell me Lee yongbok and I'll do it. Even if it meant harm to me. Just say it."

"No"

"Yongbok....please"

"I messed up seungmin."

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My irregular uploading pattern is because of CAIEs anyways British council<<<<

everyone better pray that I get As on my subjects-