Not What I Thought

The Letter

Hello, my Lightning Bolts that are so fabulous! This story might be going quick so far, but I reach a certain point where my creative juices slow down, so the story might slow down. But never fear, Lady Lightning is here! And I will try to keep going.

(Scott POV) One Month Later (May 2021)

"Scott!" My father calls. I sigh and set down my quill. I push away from my desk and trudge to the door. Crumpled paper on the floor crunches under my feet. So much for writing a letter to Cod Boy. I pull on my slippers and crunch out of the room. I walk down the stairs, sliding my hands over the dark wood rail. 

"Yes, Father?" I say as I enter the main hall. The open windows make my eyes itch. Rivendell, surrounded by mountains and frozen lakes, is not the best for warm weather. "You have a letter from Oceana." My brain starts whirring as he hands me the letter. It takes me a moment to process what he's saying. 

Oceana? Could it be? Cute Cod Boy, with the adorable green eyes, who had been so obviously flustered by me? Surely not. I open the envelope, which is tied with a green ribbon. As I pull out the letter, I catch a whiff of saltwater. The letter reads:

Dearest Scott Major,

We regret to inform you that Elizabeth Solidarity has plans regarding your marriage proposal. As a replacement, James Solidarity will be your bride. You have 5 years to plan and prepare before James turns 21. May Aeor guide your thoughts and bring you wisdom.

- Queen of Oceana

Wait, James? Cod Boy with the cute blush? Marriage proposal? The last 2 words I must have said out loud, because my father answers me. 

"Yes, I thought it best to...keep it quiet for your own sake. Until I thought you were ready." I want to scream at him. Until I was ready? And when would that be? When you found out I was gay and forced me to be married? When you realized that I wouldn't be able to take the amount of pressure you put on me to be perfect since Xornoth disappeared? When you stopped blaming me for him disappearing? I wordlessly pass him the letter.

"Ah," he says as he reads it. "Well, that makes no difference. Just a minor setback. If you were going to marry the girl, we could have the wedding in 3 years, when you both turned 21. Not much to do about that, though. The girl has her own agenda." he shrugs and walks away, leaving me staring at him. 

Does he really not care who I'm marrying? Am I that worthless, a pawn in his horrible power games? I shake my head. I have to talk to Cod Boy about this. I race upstairs. I pull on my cloak, forgetting how warm it is outside. I push my windowsill up, the wind blowing my hair into my mouth. I huff, grabbing my pack and stuffing it with food. I launch myself off the window terrace, letting the breeze blow my elytra higher. 

As I near the Oceana port, I circle until I get low enough to pull my wings in. My boots crash loudly against the old wood, and I drop to a knee while the echo reverberates through me. I race into the village, searching each street for the familiar face. I catch a glimpse of blond hair on one street, but it's only a young woman, leading a child away from the wharf. 

I pull back onto the main street, congested with fishermen and shopkeepers, all busy trying to get home or sell something. I finally see him, holding a glass of lemonade out to a small girl. The little girl smiles shyly and walks closer to him. Jimmy leans down and the girl whispers in his ear. His smile gets bigger, and he laughs. The little girl waves to him and scampers off to her mother, who's waiting with a patient look on her face. Jimmy waves goodbye to them and turns to leave.

I hide behind a house until he passes me. "Cod Boy!" I whisper urgently. When he turns, looking confused, I grab his arm and lead him into an empty shed. When he finally looks at me, his eyes light up. I pull the letter out of my pack, tightening my fist around it. I advance on him, pointing my finger at him. "Is this some kind of cruel joke? Or did your mother plan this whole thing?" He looks so confused, so I shove the letter at him. He sinks into one of the rickety wooden chairs sitting in the shed. 

He must get to the marriage part, because he makes a choked noise in the back of his throat and glances up at me. I glare back at him, trying to shoot daggers through my eyes. "I had nothing to do with this letter." he says defensively. "And," he adds, like he's trying to convince himself. "I'm straight. So we can 'get married' and be friends, not romantic at all, right? All for show. All for the people." 

I don't feel less tense, but more so. I nod, then sit in the chair beside him. The thing is, I want to be more than friends. He's straight, though, so I can't say anything to make him uncomfortable. The heat and humidity of the shed feel like a weight, and I breathe hard. Jimmy looks fine. I guess Rivendell is really far north. That gives me an idea. 

I can do something to make him as uncomfortable as comedically possible. I stretch and pull off my cloak, then untie the strings tying the neck of my shirt together. I pull off my shirt. "It's so much hotter in Oceana than Rivendell." 

Jimmy doesn't meet my eyes, but then he sits up. "Do you want to go swimming?" he asks. I can tell he's uncomfortable, but he sounds so excited I can't help but say yes. He grabs my hand. I hurriedly grab my shirt and cloak before he yanks me out the door. He practically runs to the beach, dragging me along. I bump into multiple people, apologizing profusely. 

Jimmy, on the other hand, seems to go straight through the crowd. For royalty, he seems to be pretty invisible. When we reach the beach. He lets go of my hand, but at the last second, I trip over a rock, dropping my clothes and getting mud all over my face. Jimmy laughs, but runs back to the water, pulling his shoes off and rolling up his pants. He sprints in with so much reckless abandon and pure joy, and I laugh at how he dives right under. 

I wade in much slower, the cold water cooling me off immediately. I don't see Jimmy, but the water is really murky. When I get really deep in, I lift my hands, full of water, to wash off my face. As soon as my hands get close to my face, though, the water freezes into a hard block. "The heck," I murmur, dropping the ice. Instantly, it turns back to liquid as though it had been melted. When Jimmy comes back up, it's less of a pop and more of a leap. 

He looks like a dolphin, and he has this huge grin on his face. He dives back into the water. When he comes back up, he's right in front of me. Before I realize what's happening, he leans forward and kisses me. On impulse, I kiss him back. But then my brain processes what's going on, and I pull back. 

Jimmy looks at me with a confused look on his face. I just stare at him, then start swimming quickly back to shore. I know he could easily catch up, but he doesn't try to stop me, just lets me go. I reach the beach fast, grabbing my clothes and strapping on my elytra. 

I take off, still dripping water. I think he calls my name, just once. "Scott!" But I don't answer because I can't. My mind refuses to think until I get home. My window is still open, so I land on the terrace and collapse inside on my bed. 

He lied to me. He straight-up lied to me. I hate him. Getting married doesn't mean we have to like each other. I hate him so much because I love him and I don't know how he really feels. I hate not knowing and I hate being like this. What makes me feel worse is that he said he didn't like me, and then he kissed me, which means he must have been pretending. I can't believe I let this happen. I can't be around him anymore, he makes me unstable and uncontrollable.

I am so sorry my amazing Lightning Bolts, but I had to add the angst in somewhere.