Twist & Shout

Chapter 4

November, 1967-

It was strange how a three day promise could get lost. Cas was swamped with work and Dean was out every weekend racing or prepping or outfitting bikes at Bobby's garage. Cas didn't mind that their interaction usually consisted of watching the new Star Trek together while he memorized medical terminology, but with the end of the summer came the end of Dean's racing season. Dean loafed around the apartment, pecking out of the fridge and complaining about how cold it was going to get in only a few weeks, between shifts at the bar. He cooked more, at least, and he was really only unbearable until the Twilight Zone came on. Cas' complaints were few.He was merely silly at best, and intolerably needy at his worst."You think I'm as good looking as William Shatner?" he asked, leaning between Cas' legs, both of them crammed on the couch, Cas trying to jot down something about Shakespeare. The university was cruel and forcing him into English classes to make him well rounded. He had no interest in Shakespeare unless Shakespeare had written something on how to pass his chemistry class while still having time to write critical analysis essays."Anything is possible," Cas replied, resting the back of his book on Dean's head, scrawling something on his legal pad. Dean snorted indignantly, popping a pez from the dispenser in his hand. Cas heard the crunch of the candy as he chewed it."Watch this one. It's got the creepy doll. William Shatner isn't in it though," Dean insisted as the opening to the Twilight Zone kicked in. When Cas didn't respond he knocked his elbow into Cas' leg."Dean, I can't. I'm studying.""You study all the time, come on and watch with me. I barely see your face because it's always in a damn book," Dean whined, reaching blindly behind him to swat at the volume. Cas rolled his eyes and kept reading, pulling the book out of Dean's reach."Go find something to do," he sighed, tapping his pencil against his chin."Let's fool around," Dean twisted, looking at Cas who refused to make eye contact. "Come on," he jabbed. "Come on, let's make out orsomething.""Dean, what am I going to do when I tell my patients I can't help them because I was too busy having my dick sucked by my boyfriend?" Cas grumbled, trying to concentrate."I don't know. Your boyfriend is really good looking. He's really cute, and he can ride a motorcycle, and he can do all sorts of fun things." Cas became vaguely aware of the fingers walking up the back spine of his book and creeping over the edge. "If you cooperate I'll give you a pez," Dean continued, clicking another candy out."You are absolutely depraved. I can't fool around with you right now," Cas groaned, tapping Dean's forehead with the pencil. "Please go find something else to do before I lose my mind?""I already know what I want to do. I want you to come with me and we'll go on the bed and turn off the light and you'll let me put my hand in your pants."Cas didn't gratify him with a response and Dean pouted, resting his cheek against Cas' knee for a while."You doing anything this weekend?" he asked out of nowhere and Cas' brow wrinkled. He glanced up from his notes and resigned himself to giving Dean his attention."You know I'm not. Why do you ask?"Dean turned back around, stretching his legs out, head pillowed by Cas' stomach while he watched TV."You probably wouldn't want to because you have a book to read.""Dean," Cas said, shaking his head. "What? What did you have planned? We just went out to the country two weeks ago.""Well, I owe you a trip to the beach," Dean started, not turning around. Cas cocked his head curiously. Owed him? When was that?"You know, after I won that race against Boyd? I told you I'd treat you to three days or something.""That was over a year ago.""Well, yeah, but still!""Ok," Cas said timidly, closing his book, "I remember.""I know it's starting to get cold, but I thought we could go to the beach. There won't be as many people and if we go early we might have it to ourselves for a few hours. We can do other stuff too, like visit the marina or maybe go see your sister."Cas stalled."I don't think so.""You said she'd moved out there, though. And you want to see her! I know you do!" Dean had sat up now and turned around. Cas tossed the book on the floor and opened his arms, Dean sliding forward to rest against his chest."I don't want to surprise her like that. She's moved back up with my Grandmother 'til she goes to school in January. And just because she told Anna Milton about it doesn't mean she meant for me to know," Cas added quietly, playing with Dean's hair. Anna had been kind enough to pass the message along when he'd met to help her with a research paper. Cas wouldn't admit to Dean how he'd tried to pry more information out of her. Rachel hadn't told Anna too much, but whatever Cas could get was enough.Dean sighed against him.."Sure, we won't see your sister then. We'll just go to the beach.""We'll have a good time," Cas assured him. "We can play with your new camera."Dean brightened, smiling, nestled between Cas' legs, his body warm and heavy."That'd be fun. Record it all or somethin'," he rambled, pushing into the stroke of Cas' hand over his forehead."I can't believe they gave you a camera instead of cash. We should have sold it," he said, thinking about it on the shelf in the closet, unused."Well, then I'm going to sell your Polaroid," Dean threatened, and Cas paused his scalp massage to pinch him. "Ow!""I'm just saying we could have used the money. You're running us out of house and home with how much you eat.""We're fine; besides, video cameras are cool. I've never had one. It could come in handy someday.""When would a video camera come in handy?" Cas laughed, rubbing the back of Dean's neck, the other arm looped around his back."I don't know, I'm just saying it might. One day you may thank me for not letting you sell it," Dean said sagely in return, nuzzling his face further into the collar of Cas' loose sweater.Cas laughed softly and ran his fingers through the back of Dean's hair, and he could feel Dean's lips brush against his collarbone. He hummed softly, smiling. "When that day comes, I'll be sure to thank you."Cas had no idea what to bring to the beach with them besides Dean's video camera and his Polaroid. It was getting cold so he was sure the water would be even colder, so they probably wouldn't be able to go swimming, but just being at the beach with Dean would be enough for him. He packed a couple of sweaters and shirts, and couple of pair of jeans along with other essentials. It took Dean the rest of the week to pack because he couldn't decide on what he wanted to bring.It was funny actually, that Dean wanted to look his best when he was going to the beach. In the end, Cas went through their bag and replaced some of the items that Dean had packed with other more suitable pairs of clothing. The last thing to get packed was the video camera, and Cas hung his Polaroid camera around his neck, bag slung over his shoulders, ready to go. Dean walked out of their bedroom and approached him, looping his fingers through his belt loops and pull him flush against him."We're gonna have fun this weekend." He smiled as he kissed Cas, and Cas brought his hands up, sliding over Dean's chest to rest on his shoulders."Shame that we can't do that in public."Cas pressed his face into Dean's neck for a moment before pulling away, adjusting the straps of the bag and pulling his camera up to his face, looking through the viewfinder. Dean looked away and Cas snapped a picture. The camera whirred and clicked before producing a picture, and Cas pulled it away, waiting a moment before pulling the front off, revealing the picture of Dean."You're really photogenic, you know?" Cas laughed softly, and Dean smiled as he walked past him, snatching the picture from Cas. "Hey-!""Hmm, you're right," Dean inspected the photo as he opened the door, walking out into the hallway of the apartment building, Cas following behind him and closing the door on his way out."Give it back, Dean!"Dean didn't give it back 'til they were at Bobby's truck, their borrowed transportation for the weekend. Their things crammed in the back, Cas climbed into the cab, slamming the door, smoothing the folded corner of the photo. He pulled the camera over his head and put it on the floor, curling his own feet onto the dashboard, inspecting the scuffs on his loafers, the picture still held loosely in his hand.Dean turned on the radio and they both sang along to songs they knew, laughing when they realized they had forgotten the lyrics. The ride wasn't terribly long, but Dean wouldn't let Cas drive, and so he'd gotten bored and ended up reading and napping, only waking up when Dean told him he'd checked them into a small hotel about twenty minutes from the water."We can go up there if you want. Woman up front said we'd come during the wrong season, but I told her you were my cousin visiting from out of state and you'd never seen the Pacific before."Cas smiled sadly at the lie."Two beds?" he sighed, and Dean nodded."We can squeeze," he replied, opening the cab up to pull their bags out. Cas followed, and he supposed it really wasn't that bad. They were standard doubles, to his relief, sitting down on one while Dean tossed their bags on the other. He eyed Cas up and Cas quirked the corners of his mouth up when Dean advanced, rolling them on the clean, slightly musty, coverlet."Thank you," he whispered, looking into Dean's eyes, and Dean kissed him chastely."Thank you," Dean mirrored and Cas frowned, barking a laugh."Whatever for?" he breathed, rubbing his thumb on Dean's chin. Dean shrugged. He never did answer, and Cas wasn't convinced he knew exactly what it was he was trying to say. He just looked at him for a long time before straightening and stretching."Well, we've got hours to kill before nightfall. You want to go look at the water?" he asked and Cas smiled, eager.They drove through the sleepy town, following the signs to the beach. Dean didn't say much, and Cas didn't either, looking out the window, watching the landscape roll by. He placed his hand on Dean's thigh at some point and Dean took his own off the wheel to cover it. The window was cool against Cas' cheek, and he imagined the glass like a camera, the trees and grass scrolling along, his eyes the shutter, remembering all of it, tucking it away with the millions of other little memories he had collected over the past six months.The real camera was idle at his feet, its beige case bumping his ankle every so often.The road narrowed and forked, curving around either side of the small bay. Where trees once lined the road opened up into a plain that sloped down to the beach, the wind rattling through the tall, weedy, grass and the short scrubby bushes. Dean made Cas choose a direction, but it didn't really matter. There were no other cars. The tires crunched when Dean turned it into the little parking area, cutting the engine and rubbing his hands. He looked at Cas, but Cas was trying to see over the rocks in front of them, opening the door and stepping out, pulling his boots with him. He sat against the truck and tugged his loafers off, nudging his feet into the boots, listening to the rustle of Dean grabbing his coat from the back seat and shifting it on.Cas shut the car heavy truck door once he had finished changing his shoes and jogged up to the edge of the little carved out space for parking. He stepped up, climbing up the rock face in front of him, and then jumped down, facing the beach. Beyond that, a winding trail through the grass led to the water crashing on the sand. Cas stood for a moment, fingers splaying and curling against his palms, watching the waves as they slid in and out, gulls screaming overhead, their shrill voices carrying on the wind. They dove at the sea, silhouettes muddied by the overcast sky, while the wind sliced through Cas' hair, making his cheeks rosy. He pulled his windbreaker closer to him, tugging the strings at the collar so it went closer to his neck, and after a few more seconds of watching the surf, leaped back down to the loose gravel, wandering to the truck. He picked up the blanket they'd brought and held it against his chest before jogging back to the point, squeezing between the boulders, eager to look over the bay again.The grey water crashed, and Cas found himself smiling despite the wet chill threatening to sneak under his jacket. He heard the scuff of a shoe against the rocks and turned to see Dean slipping around the side, squinting in the breeze, looking out at the swells with a subdued sort of happiness. He walked a few steps 'til he was standing next to Cas, and his lips curled up, cutting into the side of his mouth in the crooked way Cas loved best."So?" he said, and Cas heard the wind roar on his ears and he moved his eyes from Dean back to the Pacific. The bright checks of his mackinaw coat made him look like a giant red poppy among the bleak rocks and sandy colored landscape, the video camera cradled in its case under one arm."We always went to the coast when we were kids," Cas answered truthfully. "But that was during the summer."Dean scoffed, putting his free arm around Cas, taking in the bare beach, devoid of any other people."Well, you're all grown up now, so I figured you needed a new experience," Dean told him, free to take his hand. Cas let himself be lead down the slope towards the water, his own boots filling the shallow prints Dean left behind."Everything with you is a new experience," Cas continued quietly, blushing, once they had finally gotten to the flat of the sand, squeezing Dean's fingers reflexively as he tripped over a rock. The seabirds circled above, watching them, ducking their heads, beaks opening up in harsh calls."Like I told you!" Dean smiled. "All to ourselves!" Cas looked around the deserted sand and saw that it was true – not a soul except for the two of them. It was quiet except for the methodical rush of the waves and the cries of the gulls. The sun peaked through the overcast clouds and speckled the water with light before slowly folding itself up again. Cas dropped the blanket and let go of Dean's hand, wandering towards the pull of the water without a word. He could feel Dean watching him as he zigzagged over the sand, stopping to pick up a shell and then toss it back to the sea, his hair blowing as he approached the dark waves. Dean didn't follow, letting him get to the edge, staring at the threshold of the beach where the water capped and crashed, and then glided up to the toes of his shoes. He turned back to Dean, eyes wide and Dean smiled, taking a step to him."There's a crab!" Cas said, pointing, and Dean came up to him, watching the little creature walk its charming sideways walk back into the water, bobbing with the shallow swirls that pounded relentlessly on the shore. Cas watched it, enraptured, and Dean gently slipped again into the realization that there was no one else. The empty beach echoed his thoughts, and Cas looked up at him, tugging the sleeves of his sweater past the sleeves of his jacket, his fingers starting to get stiff from the constant gale coming off the water.  Cas didn't say anything as he studied Dean's face – he merely looked back out at the water, turning his head to gaze off at the western corner of the sky. "A boat!" he commented, raising his arm, his finger following it as the vessel sailed slowly across the bay. Dean pressed closer to him, chuckling when Cas abandoned his pointing to wave at it. There was no response, but Cas waved anyway, and Dean, after a moment, did too.When they weren't acknowledged they let their arms drop, fingers brushing against each other's hands before tangling."That'd be nice," Cas spoke. "To sail. You know? Just out on the water like that," he gestured at the waves. "Nobody to tell you how to be or where to go.""By yourself?" Dean continued, pulling on Cas' hand, putting his other in his pocket, leading him along the water, watching the waves come in and out, always just close enough to his shoes, but never touching. Cas shrugged. The blanket and camera were a little dark dot up the slope, one corner of the blanket flapping in the wind like a little blue flag."Well, with you, of course," he amended, flashing Dean a grin and Dean laughed lightly, leaning his head back to look at the birds swooping from the rocks. "I mean it!" Cas teased. "You and me. We could get a boat – one of those nice ones, you know, a house boat or something! We could just sail around the world. That'd be nice. I bet you're allowed to kiss me in international waters."Dean smirked at him."I'm sure I'm allowed to do more than that-!"He was silenced as Cas punched him gently in the arm."Don't ruin it!" Cas growled, playfully, and Dean let go of his hand just long enough to sling his arm around his shoulders, roughly bringing Cas' head to his, kissing his hair firmly, and then the side of his face, Cas staggering along. Cas put a hand against Dean's side, attempting to pry himself off, but Dean was strong and he knew Cas didn't want to get away. Not really. He kissed him again, right at the corner of his eye."You're just so poetic," he sighed against Cas' ear, teasing, and Cas knocked his ribs with his forearm. Dean earned a laugh, though.