magical girl.com

chapter 4 - what have i done.

1/2/20 11:32 am.

i left the mall just in time, it was just closing.
time to go to Amys!

i walked over to the road, pressed a cool button, and crossed when it told me so.
be like me kids!! cross the street with caution!!!!!!!

i was around halfway there when i realized
wow
this heap of random stuff is not presentable
i need like a basket or something.

so i grabbed a basked, and layed it nicely in the basket with a few balloons.
cy
now we can go

i slowly walked to Amy's house, expecting the worst.
what is she doesnt forgive me? what if she hates me? what if even amys dad hates me?

i knocked on the door.

no answer
i knocked again

no answer.

i finally realized, that i had s key Amy gave me a long time ago. i used that.

i walked in.
"Amy??"
i shouted.

no answer.

the silence is so loud

i walked upstairs near Amy's room.
i knock.

no answer.

is Amy home??

i havent gotten any answer?

i tried to open the door, but it was locked.

"Amy? its me? Silvia? can i come in? i want to apologize."
i still didnt get an answer

please answer.
open the door?

i tried opening the door again, no answer.

i peak under the door to see if Amy is home.

i looked around, and all i could see was razor blades on the ground, and feet.
dangling from the ceiling.

my heart stopped, my stomach fell out, everything went blurry.
i started sobbing.

"AMY??"
"PLEASE"
nothing. i dont know what i expected.
shes gone.

i try as hard as i can.
i couldnt open it.

i dash downstairs into the kitchen, and into the garage.
there was no car there.
i start rapidly searching for something to break the door with.
i found a crowbar.
i hurry back to Amy's room, and break the door.

shes gone.
Amy.
she killed herself.
its all my fault, isnt it?
where is her dad?
he should be home.
but j cant call him.
i cant even tell where anything else is.

everything was blurry, all i could comprehend was that Amy was there, hanging from the roof, with a rope around her neck.
the world is spinning so fast, im going to trip.
i throw up.
that doesn't make anything better.

fuck
fuck
fuck
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
ITS ALL MY FAULT. IM SO STUPID UGH
I SHOULD HAVE SEEN THE SIGNS.
NOW, BECAUSE OF MY STUPID BEHAVIOUR AMY IS DEAD.
WHY COULDN'T I HAVE BEEN HERE.
WHY AM I HERE?
NONE OF THIS CAN BE REAL.
NOTHING.
I HAVE DECIDED TO BELIEVE NOTHING THAT IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW IS REAL.
ITS BETTER TO THINK ABOUT THAT.
ITS EASIER TO COMPREHEND.

AMY IS DEAD.
AMY.

i fall to the floor, violently sobbing.
nothing could stop me from crying. absolutely nothing.
i cant feel anything.
i cant breath.
before i know it, im
laughing?
why the hell am i laughing.?
this is serious.
what is wrong with me.
Amy.
why.
i sound like a fucking maniac right now.

im laying on the floor, beside my dead friend, sobbing, and laughing.
why cant i stop??????
please. stop. i hate this. i don't want to laugh.
i want to cry.
but i cant stop.

someone is going to walk in and think im insane.

i need to call Amy's dad.

but i cant even move. never mind talk.

after i don't even know how long, i finally stopped laughing.

a long time after that, i finally managed to stand. couldn't do anything else, other then stand there and look around.

i look at Amy's body. she looks like she is in horrible condition.
her wrists.
some of those don't look fresh.
not all of them are new.
self harm scars.
crap i need to call someone. she needs help. we need the police.

there was two notes.
stapled into her skin.
her skin.
how much did that hurt.
at this point i feel like this was someone else's doings.
Amy wouldn't do that.
then again, thats what all people say when somtjkng like this happens. "———- wouldnt do that."
we lie to ourselves to make us feel better.

i looked at the notes.
one of them said "to dad."
and the other said "to Silvia.".

i was afraid, vut i took the note off of her skin. she started bleeding.
i was horrified. why would she do this.

i read the note.

"Dear, Silvia
it seems like you have either come back for me, of my dad gave this to you.
either way, dont you dare say "its my fault"
NO THE FUCK IT IS NOT.
you make everything about yourself you selfish fucking asshole.
i hope your next.
sorry by the way.

sincerely, Amy."

oh.
im so so sorry.
Please forgive me wherever you are, Amy.