THE GROUP OF friends all sat together in the courtyard of blackmore.mindy was beginning to explain to them what was going on, as she apparently had done last time.
"okay, nerds. listen up," she spoke, "as terrifying as this all is, i'm actually glad i get a chance to redeem myself for not calling the killers last time," she sighed.
"it's fine. okay. the way i see it, someone is out to make a sequel to the requel,"
anika raised her hand, "um, what's a requel?" she asked.
"you're beautiful, sweetie, but let's hold questions till the end."
"stab 1 took place in woodsboro, stab 2 took place in college." sam stated.
"so do we think that the killer is trying to copy the movies?" tara asked.
"that is one possibility. heroes now in college, check. suspicious new characters brought in to round out the suspect list, and or body count" she looked at ethan, quinn, valentina, and anika, "check, check, check, and check."
"well, thanks." valentina pursed her lips.
"i don't like this." ethan said.
"but it can't just be about stab 2,"
"why not?" tara questioned.
"it would make sense if this were just a sequel, but we're not in a sequel, because nobody just makes sequels anymore,"
she paused.
"we're in a franchise! and there are certain rules to a continuing franchise,"
"i had a feeling," sam said.
"rule one, everything is bigger than last time. bigger budget, bigger cast, bigger body count, longer chases, shootouts, beheadings, you gotta top what came before to keep people coming back,"
"beheadings?" chad asked.
"beheadings." mindy replied and valentina sighed.
"rule two, whatever happened last time, expect the opposite. franchises only survive by subverting expectations. if the killers last time were whiny, snowflake film nerds with letterboxd accounts instead of personalities, you can bet the opposite will be true here," ethan's eyes widened as he looked down.
"and rule three, no one is safe. legacy characters - cannon fodder at this point. usually brought back only to be killed off in some cheap bid for nostalgia. it's not looking too good for gale and kirby," she grimaced.
"oh, and that's not even the worst part,"
"oh, this is the part where she tells us the worst part." he continued taking notes, which valentina softly laughed at.
"the worst part is, franchises are just continuing episodic installments designed to boost an ip. which means main characters are completely expandable now, too," everyone looked at her.
"laurie strode, nancy thompson, ellen ripley, sally hardesty, jigsaw, tony stark, james bond, and even luke skywalker all died just so their franchises could live on. that means it's not just the friend group, any of us could go at any time - especially sam and tara." she finished.
"wait, any of us?" ethan asked to which mindy replied, "yeah."
"does- am- am i in the friend group? am i like one of the targets of-" mindy nodded her head.
"am i gonna die a virgin?" ethan asked.
valentina opened her mouth to say something but she quickly shut it.
"that was a weird overshare. but it brings us to our current suspect," she walked towards where val, ethan, tara, and chad were sitting.
"ethan. the shy, dorky guy who no one suspects because he's so shy and dorky," she explained.
"okay, why am i on the suspect list? because i'm randomly chad's roomate?" he defended himself
"roomate lotteries can be juked. you could've fixed it to get next to us." ethan rolled his eyes.
she moved over to where quinn, anika, and sam were sitting.
"quinn. the slutty roomate - a horror movie classic," she kissed her fingers.
"sex positive, but, thank you?" quinn responded.
"mhm, um how did you come to live with sam and tara?" mindy asked the red haired girl.
"i answered their ad online," quinn looked over at sam who nodded.
"okay, say no more, you've already implicated yourself enough,"
"it was an anonymous ad, mindy. and you know we vetted her, plus her dad is a cop." tara defended quinn.
"and that makes it more likely that she's the killer because having a cop dad is a great coverage, do you not remember how these movies work, tara?" mindy argued.
"is she always like this?" quinn asked anika.
"valentina," mindy looked over at the girl who sighed.
"how did you become roomates with sam and tara?" she asked.
"same as quinn. i answered their online ad." she shrugged.
"mhm, okay, sure," mindy said sarcastically.
"dude." valentina held up her hands in defense.
"finally, anika," she looked over at her girlfriend who blew her kiss, mindy blowing a kiss back.
"never trust the love interest." mindy said, and anika's smile dropped.
sam sat up, "okay, so we have our rules and we have our suspects-"
ethan interrupted her, "wait, wait, wait, what about you guys?" ethan asked, referring to mindy, chad, sam, and tara.
"i mean, i think it's pretty safe to rule out the four of us who went through this last year in woodsboro." mindy spoke.
chad pointed at her, "agreed."
"um, not agreed," quinn started, "what if the trauma you all went through caused one, or more, of you to snap?"
ethan agreed, "yeah, or the fame you got from the killings made you thirsty for more? i mean, to be honest here, some of the theories online about sam are-"
"don't you fucking dare." tara glared at him.
ethan gave her an, "okay," look and valentina rolled her eyes at the boy's dumb assumption.
"okay, she's right though. i mean face facts, if we're all suspects, you're all suspects."
everyone looked over at valentina who stayed silent the whole time.
"i mean i wouldn't suspect you guys but isn't it always the person you expect the least?"
SADIE SPEAKS
i was gonna write more
but i haven't posted in a
while so this will have to
do 🤷♀️🤷♀️also idk if i should make
ethan ghostface pls help
someone 😭😭remember to vote and
comment !! 💗
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Die For You ━ E. Landry
FanfictionIt'll never change my mind. Ethan Landry x Fem!oc © crtegas 2023