Beyond The Bridge [ONC 2023] // Longlisted

Chapter Twenty-Three

"There was an ulterior motive for me meeting you at the stream and flipping that coin," he says, readjusting his weight. His voice shakes a little.

"What do you mean?"

I think back to the meeting that decided it all, the day Levi had flipped that coin and we had made the decision to follow the river. There was nothing all that unusual about it. Levi had been his usual annoying self, and I had been trying to enjoy my afternoon at the bridge without having to think too much about the chores waiting for me when I returned home. I thought Levi had just come to annoy me as usual.

He rakes a hand through his damp hair, causing it to stick up in every direction possible. There's a slight tremble in his fingertips, a nervousness radiating from every move he makes in the slither of sunlight. I have never seen him so nervous. Levi has always been so sure of himself, so arrogant that I always thought he needed a touch of humility if he were able to survive.

Nervous is not an attitude I ever thought I would associate with the great Levi Edgeworth. Never in a million years.

"I wanted us to spend some time together as we used to when we were children and Mother didn't stand in the way of us being friends. The coin showed tails when I first flipped it, but I swapped it to the other side when you weren't looking. The truth is, I just wanted to spend time with you alone without Mother or anyone else likely to get involved and try to stop us."

"Why? After all these years, why would you suddenly want to spend the day with me?"

"I've been trying to for a long time, Gracie. When I would see you at the bridge, I always tried to escape Mother's watchful eye, but I couldn't manage it. If you weren't on the bridge, I would wait for a day when you were there. The opportunity never presented itself until the other day."

I look at him, trying to understand what he means. My heartbeat threatens to leap out of my chest, wondering how many times he tried to escape the watchful eye of his mother to join me on the bridge. There had been a few times when I thought I had seen him watching me from a window on the Edgeworth property, but I never thought it to be because he was deliberately trying to look for me.

Never did I think that anything could happen, or even start to happen, between Levi and me. We had been friends growing up, but his upbringing had forced a wedge between us that I thought would be the end of our friendship. Yet Levi wanted it to continue, perhaps he wanted it to turn into something more. I think back to those small moments in the cave. Him looking after me when I collapsed, letting me sleep on his shoulder, and playing with my hair.

At the time, I thought he had just been nice to me. Part of me wondered if he was trying to correct the blame he felt for leading me into the cave in the first place, but what if it was something more?

The butterflies in my stomach stir as Levi continues to run his thumb over my knuckles.

"The truth is, I've always liked you." He smiles. "The way you shake your head at my jokes but still smile, your determination to solve any problem placed in front of you, how you manage to keep a cool head when everything seems to be going wrong. If you hadn't been in that tunnel, I never would have had the strength to get out myself. You saved my life, Gracie, in more ways than one."

I turn my head from him, casting my eyes to the ground. "I just did what I had to do."

"No, you didn't. You could have left me down there because of my leg, but you didn't. Instead, you fastened a splint and helped me to walk through all those tunnels even when you didn't feel well yourself. The way you behaved in those tunnels made me realise that I cannot live without you. I've never been able to. Regardless of what Mother says, I cannot see my future with anyone else."

"No." I pull my hand out of his and take a step back. "We can't, and you know it. Your mother would never allow it and you most likely only feel this way because of the trauma we just experienced together."

"Maybe so. You are the only person who knows what happened down there, who will understand the fear that came from the collapsing tunnel. You're the only person who knows the same feelings of hunger and exhaustion that we went through. No one else will ever understand that." He takes my hand again. Look me in the eye and tell me that you don't feel the same, that our time in the tunnel hasn't changed the way you feel about me."

I can't and he knows it. The moment his hand touches mine, the butterflies in my stomach take off and I cannot stop or control them. He's right. No one else will ever understand what we went through in those tunnels, the fear, the weariness, the thoughts of giving up and wondering if we would ever make it out again. I could try my best to explain it, but no one else will ever understand.

Our journey through the tunnels has created a new bond between us, a new affection and understanding for one another. I cannot fight the inevitable or hide my feelings, even though I know that what we want will never be accessible. We were from two different spheres and a shared experience in the darkness of the caves doesn't change that.

Levi and I's lives will always head in different directions, moving away from one another and following paths that have always been laid out for us. He had been right, though. Life can be surprising in the most unexpected ways.

I look up, our eyes make contact in the darkness. He smiles and I find myself smiling back, the two of us just staring in a shared understanding of our feelings for each other. Levi lifts a hand and places it on my chin, tilting my head towards him and kissing me softly.

~~~

First Published - March 17th, 2023