Finding My Yellow Brick Road

Chapter Three - The Scarecrow

AFTER WANDERING AROUND for what seems like forever, we hear loud, obnoxious laughing in the distance. As we get closer, I can make out some words.

"Succulent and divine!" One voice says.

"Delicious and nutritious!" Another voice adds.

"Brother crows, this is good stuff here!" Yet another voice says.

Oh, boy, I think, we've gotta deal with crows now, too? This literally cannot get any worse.

Yet another voice speaks up. "I'm glad you fellas are enjoyin' your breakfast. Hey, fellas, is today the day you gon' help me get down from here?" This voice is softer, sweeter than the other crows.

"One of the crows must be stuck somewhere," I tell Dorothy, who just nods. We decide to hide around the corner, until we get a better idea of what's waiting for us.

"Help you down?" Multiple voices say at once.

"Man, what is goin' down in that hayloft you call a head?"

For being literal birds of a feather, they seem like real jerks to that one crow.

"Didn't we tell you yesterday, and the day befo' that, and the day befo' that–"

"That you can't get down?"

"This is your life, buddy, all hung up!"

"Besides, Clyde, us crows are just thinkin' of you. There ain't nothin' to get down fo'!"

They're making it seem as though the one that's stuck isn't a crow at all? What else could he be?

"But I was just thinkin', just once fellas . . . for a little while, just to take a walk in my garden, wouldn't that be terrific, fellas?"

A garden, huh? The poor guy seems pretty desperate. I wonder how long he's been stuck.

"Walk?" Multiple voices shout incredulously.

"You can't walk!"

"Why, you just a straw paper dummy!"

That's just messed up. Why are they being such jerks to this guy?

"You're right, fellas, I was just bein' selfish."

My heart breaks for this guy. These crows have been lying to him for who knows how long.

"And stupid as usual!" Multiple voices shout.

"But I was readin' this mornin' that most people –"

"Oh, man!"

"Look, didn't we tell you that readin' was a waste of time?"

I scoff in disbelief. I happen to love reading. I think it's a wonderful thing to lose yourself to words on paper.

"But Bacon here said –"

"Bacon? Once over lightly, please!"

"'Knowledge is power.' See, and uh, Cicero, why he said –"

"Cicero-row-row your boat!"

"'More men are ennobled by study than by nature.'"

The crows just laugh at the poor guy, not caring.

"And over here, especially apropos in my situation . . . i.e. stuck up on this here pole: 'Do not accept any situation. Question, argue and explore.'"

"Speak up, brotha," I say under my breath so as to not be heard.

"Now who you gon' believe?" A crow asks. "Mr. Nobody on that - that ol' piece of paper?"