If Only, If Only

Wing Woman

I was on a mission - I needed to convince Caveman to teach Zero without it being obvious that I was trying to set them up. 

After talking with Zero, I followed Caveman outside. I caught up to him and as I was about to say something, the rest of Tent D walked out of the rec room, Armpit in the middle of them...break-dancing. 

My jaw dropped, but it didn't take long for me to start laughing. 'Pit walked down the stairs, paused, and lifted his arms, cruelly exposing the world to the rancid smell of his armpits. I don't know how someone could smell so bad. I mean, I'm pretty sure he showered, it just never smelled like it. We all jumped back and covered our noses. 

"Put them down!" Everyone screamed. Zig Zag even dared to get close enough to lower Armpit's arms. We all laughed and walked to the cafeteria together, as we knew the bell would be ringing soon. Sure, camp was terrible, but the people here weren't. At least, the people in Tent D weren't. They all felt like my best friends, and I was going to miss doing things like this with them.

Now, back to the mission. I started to walk over to Caveman to persuade him to teach Zero, when X-Ray walked up next to me. 

"Hey, Scraps," he said, "how are you doing?"

I looked at him, calculating. Either he had a personality change or he wanted something. "What do you want?" I finally asked. I didn't say it in a mean way or anything, I was genuinely curious.

"What?! Nothing!" X-Ray protested, "I just wanted to say 'hi',".

I looked at him dubiously. I just wanted to convince Caveman to teach Zero. Oh, and sleep. I really wanted more sleep.

Talking to X-Ray was neither of these things.

"Okay...well, hi then," I hoped the conversation could be done now, but X-Ray continued.

"You up for a game of Pond tonight?" He asked, "I bet you 3 shower tokens I'll win,"

Pond was a screwed up version of pool. What made it different was that some of the balls had been lost long ago, so you had to hit an assortment of objects in to the hole for points.

"No, sorry." I responded after a moment. I had a mission to focus on, I didn't want to get distracted.

"Are you scared you can't beat me?" X-Ray teased light-heartedly, but I just didn't want to talk.

"No! I said I don't want to play," I snapped.

"Right, I'm sorry," X-Ray apologized. 

"No! No, I'm sorry, I don't why I did that you weren't doing anything wrong I- I got to go."

X-Ray looked into my eyes for a moment, and I realized how soft and sweet they looked. I had always thought of X-Ray as serious and stern, but really he seemed so much different in moments like these. And then I  walked away.

Good. I didn't like where that thought process was going.

Instantly, The gears in my mind started turning. X-Ray was one of my best friends, and I really liked being around him, but getting closer to him just didn't seem like a good idea to me. As a kid, I pictured myself getting married to almost every guy I made eye contact with. 

Now, I was older, and the kind of eye contact I just had with X-Ray seemed much more serious.

Anyway. It was over now, I needed to move on. I walked over to Caveman and bumped his shoulder. 

"Hey, Caveman," I chirped, "How are you doing?". The line stabbed me with guilt. It was that easy. I could have said that to X-Ray. Maybe I should have been nicer. 

No, it was too late for that. The conversation was done now, there was nothing I could change. But... maybe-

"I'm alright, just thinkin'," Caveman interrupted my thoughts.

"Oh? What are you thinking about?" I asked. 

"Zero. I feel bad. He really makes me happy, but I was kind of snappy back there," Caveman explained.

At least I wasn't alone. 

"Yeah, I get it. I was kind of rude to X-Ray just a few seconds ago, actually," I sighed, "It's just easier to not have to deal with people sometimes. I know that sounds terrible but-"

"No, no. It's true. Sometimes I just can't stand the people I love," Caveman said. "I still love them though,".

"Good to know someone can relate," I said.

"I think I actually will teach Zero, it's just that I'm so tired all the time," Caveman explained. Oh. That was easy.

I did a little celebration dance on the inside, and once I had calmed down I just said "Cool, cool."