18days

June 1, 2015, 9:44 p.m

"I love you," she giggled.

I laughed uncomfortably and then hung up fast. I took a deep breath and then sat on my bed, thinking about what I was doing, and wondered how I ended up being a lying bastard.

My body was spiked with adrenaline, thinking how Annie could find out that I was cheating on her at any second. It could all go downhill fast with just a few words...and it excited me.

Not even my friends knew what I was doing. They know that I moved, but they don't know everything that has been going on. I didn't want them to judge me, and I knew that if they knew what was going on, they'd kick my ass.

Nathan and Anthony has always been one of those guys that are loyal to their girlfriends. Their top priority? Their girlfriends and both their happiness, always comforting them and showering their girlfriends with affection.

Everyday they would talk about the things their girlfriends would tell them. How their friends got cheated on, stepped on, and taken advantage of. Anthony would preach about the right way to treat a woman, and Nathan would talk about messing the guys up.

Let's say that a lot of other girls would go after them too. Nathan and Anthony's morals and looks? I'm surprised I even got a girlfriend because of how I always had their shadow on top of me. They've been with their girl for four years, and I've only been with Annie for two years.

My heart sunk at the thought of her. What the heck was I doing?

"I'm a teenager, c'mon!" I gave myself a lame excuse for what I was doing. "I-I have things I want and...Annie would do...no she wouldn't." I laid down on my bed and gave out a large sigh of defeat.

"She's too much of an angel to do that...and I lost her already for doing this."

I pressed my lips together and made a quick decision of checking my email. Annie didn't have a phone, so she'd send me emails every day through her laptop. I stopped reading them a few days ago after I moved here...I just didn't have the heart for them anymore.

I've been deliberately ignoring her, afraid that I might slip up about what I was doing behind her back. Even with my friends, I avoided talking about my activities. I felt so guilty every time I was with the chick, but I always wanted to do it again.

With a deep breath, I saw loads of her emails. There were 18 unread emails from her, and I couldn't describe the feeling I had in my chest about seeing that. It's like I failed her...and I guess I already had.

The last email she sent was like any other, it started with her being sweet and cute as always. Annie was one of those girlfriends that a guy was lucky to have...and I miss her even though I don't deserve to.

Dear Mike,

When we first started dating, it was difficult to trust you. Of course, I did like you and you were very attractive. But that's why it was difficult. Now that we've been dating for two years and one month, I'm grateful that I didn't give up on you and that you didn't give up on me.

You've made me feel like a princess, and made me realize that I really am worthwhile. That's what I love about you, and I love you still. Mike, I feel that because of you, I'm the strong person I am today.

Though I don't know what you've been doing recently because of your move, I trust you and I know that you're probably watching TV or something. I'm really glad that I got to the point of trusting you, and you loving me and me loving you and...it was all just magical, and I want to thank you for that.