A Walking Nightmare

heart of the matter

CHAPTER ONE

From the moment Beyoncé met Onika, she vowed to never see the other woman shed tears of sadness, over the years— even before they started dating Beyoncé did everything in her powers to upheld to her promise. Not once did Onika shed tears of sadness when Beyoncé was present but as they stand here in the silence that had engulfed them after all that has been said, Beyoncé couldn't help but feel her heart break by the tears that fell down Onika's face. And what pained her most was not only the fact those tears clouding the other woman's beautiful eyes were tears of sadness, but also of disappointment and Beyoncé had nobody to blame but herself.

"Nika—" she tried pleading her case, even though she knew she had no rights whatsoever, she needed to try, she couldn't leave things like this, unsaid. She needed to say what she should have from the beginning. Before everything got so, so damn messy!

Beyoncé moved, swiftly and with caution toward the other woman, trying to offer the comfort that always worked when Onika was having a bad day but as soon as she tried the familiar language of touch that always worked in her favour, Onika pulled away as if burnt and Beyoncé's heart couldn't break anymore if she wanted it too. So she tried a different approach.

"I'm sorry"  her voice usually deep was even deeper with a tinge of roughness to it. The many hours of crying would do that to you.

"Baby I'm so, so sorry." She tried again "I know, I know I should have told you, I know that and I'm so sorry Nika"

"But you didn't. We got here because you lied! You couldn't trust me enough to tell me what happened!"

"No Nicki, gosh! Baby of course not, I trust you with my whole life!"

"THEN WHAT BEYONCÉ, WHY WOULD YOU KEEP THIS FROM ME!"

"....." Beyoncé's mouth opened and closed a couple of times like a fish out in the ocean desperate to sink back into it's home.

"I didn't know how to tell you, I messed up okay, I did and for that I'm so sorry"

Beyoncé never thought she could feel like a small child getting scold however at this moment, she didn't care. She just wanted to make everything better. Running a hand through her long hair, she tried again and this time Onika didn't move away, letting Beyoncé take a hold of her hands. The taller woman could kissed the heavens if she could as Onika accepted her comforting warmth.

She needed to say everything that she was feeling, what she should have said before, if only to make this situation a little better

"Baby I—"

Time was not on Beyoncé's side it would seem because just as she thought she was getting somewhere finally, her time was up by the announcement of a loud wimpy cry coming from the monitor resting on top of the island counter, ringing loudly throughout the big space. Both heads turns toward the device and Onika sighed, her body dropping the fight she felt instead readying to step into a different shoes.

"Can we just—" Beyoncé knew it was no use because this conversation had just ended but still—

"I need to go give him his medicine..."

And with that Beyoncé felt Onika slip away, taking with her, her warmth and a piece of Beyoncé's heart.

A great man once said, nobody can take away your happiness except yourself and Beyoncé couldn't have agreed with him more.

And as she silently listened to Onika's soothing voice through the monitor, she knew, this must end here.

'It's okay baby, mommy is here'

For her family to be whole again.

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; what we thinking? keep or delete?🫠