One Journey, the Final

Chapter 23:

The cab drove away before I could run back inside of it. Though every moment had been leading up to this, I wasn't sure if I had the courage to do this. Each step came a little slower, and the door seemed to be getting farther and farther away. It was extremely cold outside. I hadn't exactly dressed for the extra cold London weather. I rubbed my arms, though I could feel sweat forming. Sticky snow was magically falling all around me, my teeth starting to chatter. I took in a deep breath, but it didn't do much, only burning my lungs. I didn't exactly know what to expect. I didn't know what to think. It's strange to think, that in a moment that should be so clear to me, it was anything but clear. While all of this is going through my head, I found myself a few inches from his door. I shivered violently in the bitter winter air, vigorously knocking and ringing his doorbell. This was taking too long, I was pretty sure my cheeks were a bursting rosy color.

“Haaaarry!” I whined at the door. Didn’t he hear me? I heard some shuffling behind the door, followed by a crash and a wince in pain. I chuckled silently to myself. The doorknob started to twist, and the door swung open. A warm rush of air flowed outside, and cold air blew in. But the hot air suddenly wasn’t the thing shocking me. I squeaked, “Harry!”, while he jumped at the freezing temperatures hitting his bare skin. He stood there in his boxer shorts. On instinct I hurriedly pushed him inside before any of his neighbors saw him. I slammed the door closed after us.

“Please, go put on some pants or something,” I said, hiding my eyes from him. Without a word of objection he left to go get dressed. I sat myself on his couch, fumbling with the stitching on my coat, patiently waiting. A few seconds later he came in with sweat pants and an old t-shirt on. He faintly smiled when he saw me on the couch. He sat about a foot away from me, but I swear I could feel everything about him. The warmth of his body, the sweat quickly forming, his breath, and even the nervousness running through him. I had to stop myself from throwing myself on him, hugging him to death. After a few minutes of complete silence, he starts talking.

“Please, just let me say something first.” I nod to let him continue. “What I said that day, I didn’t mean to hurt you— ” But I needed to interject.

“No. I know you didn’t mean to. But you don’t understand why I’m so mad. And that’s fine. But you need to realize that you have completely and overwhelmingly taken my conscience and wellbeing. Every part of my being, I have given to you. I wanted you so badly to accept me, and you did. That’s the first time anyone has loved every ounce of me. And I was so happy to be yours!” I say, my voice quickly getting louder and more enthusiastic. “You could have asked anything of me, and I would’ve done it because I love you. And you loved me. You’ve had me from the very beginning. But when you go and say to national television that I’m not anything you’ve ever wanted? Not only did you take my soul, but you abused, and left me with nothing but a dead heart. I wanted to be everything you’ve dreamed of! But I knew that I couldn’t change, because this is who I am. Harry you didn’t hurt me because you embarrassed me, you hurt me because you rejected everything that makes up me,” I said, pouring out all that I had been keeping locked away for the past months. I felt so much better, and tears were blurring my vision. I think I heard Harry sniffling in the background. Without anything holding me back now, I threw myself into his arms, and just cried.

“I am so sorry. I wish there was a more formal way to say it, but that’s all that I know of. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I want to go back and take back everything I said. You are everything to me Annabel. There isn’t anyone else in the universe that could be more perfect for me. We were made for each other, and we are supposed to be together. And I know that from the depths of my soul. I love you. I love you,” Harry whispered in my ear. I snapped my eyes shut because I couldn’t handle this moment any more. It was too perfect, and yet overwhelming. I felt my head spinning, and I gripped Harry tighter, wanting all of him. Everything about him was familiar. These months could not break the memory of Harry. The way his arms easily enfold you, the way he smells like fresh sheets, and the way his dimples peek-a-boo at you whenever he smiles. These are the memories that I knew I would never be able to let go of, though I tried very hard to when I was with Dave. There are just things that become a part of you that you can’t ever break. For me, they were these parts in time that have engraved my mind. I’m glad I didn’t lose them though. After a few minutes of this crying fest, he quietly said,

"When you didn't respond to any of my calls, I was pretty sure that I had lost you forever. I knew that I had ruined it with that interview, I was just trying to convince myself that it wasn't true. I had to fake a smile for the rest of the tour. I wasn't the same without you. There were so many times I just wanted to pick up the phone and demand to talk to you. And then I saw you with that....Dave. I knew something was wrong. I just can't believe you came all this way." I sat up, looking into his green eyes, and they brought me back to the first time we met. All the pieces were falling back into their place.

"I did this for us. Harry I love you. And I want to marry you. For real," I whispered. He instantly smiled, and pecked me on the lips.

"Marry me Annabel."  I giggled, grazing my bottom lip with the top of my teeth. I closed my eyes and kissed him.

"Yes."