In The Eyes of The Confessor | A Destiel Fanfiction | Supernatural

Chapter 11

It was just the two of them.

Jo, Charlie and Sam had complained about being too cold long ago, and decided to head back to the Winchester's cabin for hot chocolate and marshmallows. Dean and Cas were seventeen and sixteen, the two oldest members of the group, and they decided to stay on the rocks. They wanted to watch the sun completely sink into the horizon. Dean knew that Cas always found the sight fascinating, and so he'd agreed to the plan when Cas had proposed it to him. It was probably around half past eight in the evening now, and the nasty thunderstorm that had rolled over the cabin site earlier that day had long worn off. The sun still cast a warm glow on the boys' skin, even though it was sinking lower and lower in the sky with each passing moment.

In the back of his mind, Dean knew he had different types of feelings towards Cas than he did to the others. Cas always stuck out to him, ever since that day they met at the lakeside, where Gabe had forced him into the lake. Whenever Dean looked at Cas, there was a feeling of calm and understanding. Cas was always the first person Dean thought of whenever someone mentioned what happiness felt like, the first person he wanted to talk to when he had news.

When he realised he had these feelings for the first time, he felt an odd sense of embarrassment. But then, after a while of thinking about it, and trying to work them out, he decided to just let them be. Letting himself feel however he felt seemed like the best option, and he tried not to put a label on anything. He knew that would only make everything more complicated.

But as he sat there, on that warm summer's evening, glancing over at Cas with fond eyes, the realisation hit him, and it was like a little light bulb had finally flickered on above his head.

I love him.

The words materialised in his head and he stopped breathing for a while as he swished them around in his brain, trying to get a real feel for them, trying to untangle them, to decipher them. Maybe it was a mistake. Surely he didn't love Cas, right? Love was what Dean was supposed to feel with a woman. A pretty woman with a good soul and long, flowing hair. A woman who he would settle down with and end up marrying. They would have three kids, and live in a sweet little house with a white picket fence. Right?

But as Cas scooped up a stone from beneath his worn out sandals and tossed it into the lake with little effort, the words made sense. They slotted into his life perfectly, and answered all the questions he had been storing up over the years in a box in the dusty corners of his mind.

I love him.

Dean let out a relieved sigh. It all made sense now; the feelings he had for Cas, the way his heart fluttered in his chest slightly whenever he laughed at one of his stupid jokes, the way Cas ran a hand through his messy hair after having gone for a swim in the lake after Dean had finished giving him a lesson, even though Cas claimed he didn't need the help anymore. All of it was crystal clear in his head.

He loved Cas.

And he didn't just love him. He was in love with him. He always had been, right from the start.

But of course, Dean kept this to himself. He just shook his head, pressing a hand to his mouth to conceal his smile when Cas asked him what he was grinning about.

He wasn't sure why, but it was this memory that randomly flashed through Dean's mind in the space of time between opening the door and meeting eyes with the strange, scruffy looking man stood outside the cabin.

"Who the hell are you?" Dean asked, though his voice was almost carried off into the rainy early morning by the gust of wind that slammed into his body.