Even After You

Chapter 1

I felt something vibrating under my pillow and with my squinted eyes, I could see a little light penetrating through the closed dark-brown curtains on my window. Uninterestingally, after several failed attempts of lifting myself up, I finally raised my head, pushing down my left arm and threw my pillow to the right. Unplugging it from the charger, I grabbed my phone and overturned it. The bright screen flickered directly into my eyes and a name flashed on my screen after several ceaseless nights.

'Kshiti'

5:09 am, 11th April 2023. My hands tremored with angst. I could barely encounter any power within me.

All the eluded screams
inside me
shrieked through
the citadel of my hell
where I buried them
while I lived over
a fallen Kingdom of
Love
And now I could hear them
howling through the dungeons
of my vacillation,
mounting over my umbra
and the terrain made of
my fright and vigilance
rattles under me
to restore all my demons
who sunned into the
cosmos of hate
after slumping into the
delusional crux of love.

The name flashed, and I could scarcely find happiness amidst all my amplified terrors of losing her once again. I crippled down in the middle of the darkness which inflated all the remembrance of her painted all around my dingy walls. I could hardly move my fingers over the ringing phone and I knew no direction to forge into when suddenly the phone stopped ringing.

With all my senses restored, I typed in a hurry

"You called!?"

With my ambivalent sight, I intensified my view and stared on the screen. My fingers hovered around the 'Send' button and I felt my body turning cold again. I pressed the blue button at the bottom right of the screen before I realized my mind splitting me into two halves of enmity and passion.

Instantly, a faded grey string of words 'Seen just now' appeared on the screen and my heart started pounding heavily. I scrolled on the screen and tapped over the name 'Kshiti'.

Four years ago, I didn't know what it was all about. Maybe, something making me passionate around it or maybe something that I was craving to have. Something that happened to me or quite near to something I was almost unaware about.

Yeah! I thought it was all inside the books, polished beautifully, randomly imagining something beautiful which no one ever felt, but always desired to feel it once in a life because it seems exciting, something that feels effortless to be into, but you can't even see that it will be approaching an end even if you don't want it to happen, it will near an end because everything has it, "an unwanted end".

I never have been so thoughtful about such a form of bookish fantasy, never ever I thought about something changing me so much. What could a torn page of book tell you about life and love. How can some words with over occupied meaning gather all the emotions of a person who is falling apart. And how one can find his lost pieces in a small verse which is not even meant for him.

I never thought things like 'love at first sight' and 'soulmates' to be factual. Never ever I imagined the concept of 'forever' in my life. I saw people breaking down. I saw them asking for just one more chance. I saw the ones who went into begging for someone. I saw the others lying still, cold and helpless because their 'forever' didn't last long.