In the Flower Field

Fifteen: After

The scene kept repeating in your head, he's dead he's really dead. It broke your heart even more when you saw him as a ghost. You never wanted it to end this way you naively thought that it would be different. It's never different though.

You watched from afar as Tate wandered his room. He was looking all around his bedroom with a confused look on his face. He seemed happier in death and that just made you even more angry. You wanted him to regret doing what he did yet it didn't seem to affect him. You're glad he is finally happy but for him to have to die to find happiness made your heartache.

Tate called out your name looking all around his bedroom for any sign of you. You wanted to go to him you really did but right now you need a break. Just some time to gather your thoughts and feelings because as of right now you can't even look at him without feeling sick. He kept calling out to you, his voice getting more desperate by the second. He searched the whole house for you, continuing to call out your name. Funny it took him dying for him to start looking for you again.

All you need is some time to mourn the death of your lover. A moment to sort your feelings before you face him. You still love Tate that's never going to change but knowing what he did and what he's capable of was weighing on you. How can you love someone that did something so horrible? You love Tate langdon with all your heart and you feel absolutely guilty for that. You love a killer. Your head was spinning, right now all you want to do is curl up in Tates lap.

Why did everything get so complicated? You wish you could go back to a simpler time in the two of your relationship. One where the two of you would just lay in bed together whispering small 'I love yous' to each other's lips. That seemed forever ago now though.

Tate was in complete distress when he came back into his room. Tears were running down his face while his hands pulled at the roots of his hair. You know how hard it is to transition from being alive to being a ghost, especially alone. It's a lonely and confusing time so having someone to help you transition is very important even more so when they've been through it too. You can still remember how it felt when you died you felt utterly alone. You didn't want that for Tate, so no matter what your feelings are towards him you knew you had to be there for him.Tate was dead there was no changing that, what you could change is how he spends his afterlife.

He was crying on his bed, his head in his knees. He didn't notice you at first, not until you sat on the bed next to him. His head popped up right away, tears still in his eyes as he looked at you. He looked like a lost child. "Where have you been?" You've never heard his voice so soft before. It broke your heart to see him like this, so vulnerable and so sad. You told him you needed a break, leaving out the bit that it was him you needed a break from. The way his face fell told you he knew though. Neither of you said anything about it instead falling into a silence.

You pulled him into a hug letting him cry into your neck. He no longer felt warm to the touch, yet he still exudes warmth and comfort . You desperately needed this hug just as much as he did.